A Closer Look At Long Distance Relationships

A Closer Look At Long Distance Relationships

Long Distance Relationships Info-graphic

The phrase absence makes the heart grow fonder is used by many to console those who may have their doubts about committing to a long distance relationship. However, there are many factors that go into making one work, and each case will no doubt have its own unique qualities that need addressing.

Long Distance Relationship Info-Graphic

Are you Counting the Days until you see your guy again? Do you wish for a long distance relationship that felt as if it could go that distance? This book helps you learn ways in which you can make the most of your time apart. You’ll learn new ways to communicate and share time together, even when you’re apart. It’s a great book for helping you find the answers to the probing questions people seem to have no problem asking.

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A Women’s Comprehensive Guide to Finding a Good Man

A Women’s Comprehensive Guide to Finding a Good Man

Finding a good man can sometimes feel like an impossible task, yet those good men are out there wondering where all of the good women are. Let’s see about getting you together!

One common mistake women make when searching for a good man is having unrealistic expectations. While it’s important to have standards, expecting perfection can lead to disappointment. No one is perfect, and it’s important to understand that everyone has flaws and makes mistakes.

Another common mistake is ignoring red flags. Sometimes, women may overlook certain behaviors or traits that indicate potential problems, either because they are infatuated or because they believe they can change the man. It’s important to pay attention to these red flags and not ignore them.

Often, women rush into a relationship without taking the time to truly get to know the man. Take time to understand his character, values, and lifestyle before committing to a relationship. This can help you avoid potential heartbreak and disappointment in the future.

Women sometimes make the mistake of settling for less than they deserve. This often comes from a fear of being alone or a belief that there are no good men left. However, settling for less can lead to unhappiness and resentment in the long run.

Lastly, a common mistake is not communicating effectively. Communication is key in any relationship, and it’s important to express your needs, wants, and expectations clearly. Without effective communication, misunderstandings can occur, leading to conflict and dissatisfaction.

finding a good man

Distinguishing Between Good Men and Not-So-Good Men

Now, let’s dive deeper into this topic and explore what differentiates a good man from one you want to avoid. Every good man is unique, with his own mix of character traits, habits, and values. So, it is important to appreciate the individuality of each person you meet in your journey to find a great guy.

Recognizing a man’s truly positive qualities goes far beyond surface level attributes; these qualities include tangible qualities like honesty, kindness, empathy, and respect. While these are essential, keep in mind that there’s no definitive list, as everyone’s preferences vary widely. Take your own set of values and requirements into account, too.

Speaking of requirements, you might be wondering about the ideal balance of qualities. Surely no one wants a man who’s only kind-hearted but lacks integrity, right? Therefore, consider a man who demonstrates a mix of these traits. For example, a man with both empathy and integrity respects others’ feelings and stands by his core values, creating a harmonious blend of qualities.

But remember that even good men make mistakes and can sometimes make poor decisions. No one is perfect. A quality man knows how to apologize and learn from any blunders, showing growth and maturity. Remember that the true measure of a man lies not in never faltering but in his ability to rise each time he trips.

In essence, a good man is always a work in progress, continually striving to better himself. So, when you’re looking for that special man, focus on his potential for growth and the depth of his values, and remember to keep in mind what truly matters to you.

Identifying Your Personal Needs and Wants in a Relationship

The qualities a you want in a man are largely based on individual preferences and what’s going on in your life. But some attributes stand out as universally desirable. Among them are self-directedness, great communication skills, healthy finances, reliability, and being supportive of personal growth. These traits underscore long-term compatibility, dictating the overall health and satisfaction of a romantic relationship.

Self-directedness, for instance, refers to his ability to steer his life in the direction he desires. You might find a man who is ambitious quite appealing. Not only does this trait hint at prosperity, but it suggests that he has a positive and mature relationship with financial matters, which is crucial for stability and a peaceful coexistence.

Another dominant factor is communication skills. Good communication is the lifeline of a relationship. A man with good communication skills will eagerly listen to you, resolve misunderstandings constructively, and use them as stepping stones for relationship growth. An effective communicator doesn’t just talk; they actively listen, maintain eye contact, validate your feelings, and respond thoughtfully, enhancing the overall emotional intimacy.

Reliability is a trait that echoes trust and dependability in a relationship. A reliable man won’t just promise, he’ll deliver. He’s responsible and trustworthy, someone you can lean on during trying times. This fosters security and trust in your relationship, making you feel cherished and protected.

Finally, the person you choose should not only encourage but actively support your personal growth. He recognizes your individual interests and goals, respects your personal space, and roots for your ambitions. He uplifts you to realize your potential and fortifies the bond you share.

While all men are unique, seeking these valuable attributes can certainly increase your chances of finding a man who is beneficial and fulfilling to have by your side.

Embracing the Art of Patience in Your Search

Remember, great things rarely happen quickly. Patience throughout your pursuit of a good man will be a great asset. The wait may be frustrating at times, but don’t let it deter your enthusiasm. Patience, my dear, is not merely about waiting, but the ability to maintain a good attitude while waiting.

Taking time will allow you to understand your potential partner better. It gives you a chance to observe his traits, such as humility, kindness, and adaptability. These are qualities that make a good man. A good man showcases humility, admitting to his shortcomings and constantly striving for improvement. His kindness reveals his nurturing and empathetic side while adaptability shows his open-mindedness and willingness to grow with you.

The aspect of patience also directly interlinks with trust. A good man isn’t necessarily perfect, but he’s trusting and honest. He expresses his feelings genuinely and listens with an open heart, allowing for a trusting relationship to blossom. Mutual trust is an indicator of a nurturing relationship and helps you determine if this guy is the guy you’re looking for.

Lastly, while you’re searching for a good man, use this time for self-improvement too. Finding and keeping a good man isn’t a treasure hunt; it’s more about becoming a woman that a good man wants to be with. This journey is as much about you as it is about him. So, embrace patience as a disease and transform the wait into the best time for self-discovery and personal growth.

The Role of Self-Love and Respect in Attracting Good Men

Understanding and valuing your own worth is an important piece of attracting a good man. This unwavering belief in yourself, often called self-love, empowers you to maintain an internal compass that instinctively steers you towards a healthy and fulfilling relationship. Fostering self-love promotes an environment where you can identify and demand the respect you deserve.

Think of self-love as the foundation of respect within a relationship. If you have mastered self-love, you’re already armed with the ability to ascertain whether you’re being treated with respect. This discernment is often a critical factor in distinguishing good men from not-so-good ones.

A good man, in turn, recognizes and values the self-love and respect you display, as these virtues often mirror his qualities. Characteristics such as kindness, honesty, empathy, and respect are echoes of a man who values himself and others around him. A man of integrity who respects boundaries can contribute greatly to a loving, happy, and emotionally stable relationship.

Consider this as your guide in your journey: finding a good man isn’t just about spotting his admirable qualities, but also about acknowledging and valuing your own worth. Good men are drawn to women who themselves epitomize love respect and, thus, self-love not just leads you to good men, but also acts as a magnet, attracting them into your life.

Always be patient and trust the process of self-love. It’s an ongoing process, never a destination. Always remember that in the pursuit of a good man, loving yourself and respecting your needs, wants and boundaries is of utmost importance. It can impact your interactions, satisfaction and overall experience in the process. In a nutshell, the best way to attract a good man is to first become the best version of yourself.

The Importance of Emotional Intelligence in a Good Man

Emotional Intelligence (EI) isn’t just corporate jargon or a social buzzword, it is undeniably an essential characteristic that distinguishes a good man from an average one. But why is it so important in finding your Mr. Right? Let’s dive deeper into this topic.

Why Emotional Intelligence Matters

Emotional Intelligence refers to a capacity to manage, comprehend, and respond to your emotions and those of others. It’s about emotional self-awareness, setting and managing personal emotions, empathizing with others, and maintaining positive relationships.

A man with high Emotional Intelligence recognizes his emotions, manages them wisely, supports others in distress, and handles negative emotions positively. He’s responsive instead of reactive, and also shows immense understanding and a non-judgmental demeanor towards your feelings and emotions.

Empathy and Emotional Intelligence

Empathy, an important facet of Emotional Intelligence, allows a man to understand and share your feelings emphatically. This emotional understanding provides comfort, support, and compassion, which result in deep, meaningful connections. The presence of empathy demonstrates his capacity to feel, understand, and respond to your emotional needs.

Now, imagine having a partner with this depth of emotional understanding by your side, someone who can navigate the ups and downs of life with you, with empathy, tact, and resilience. Such a man will not only enhance your well-being but also ensure the long-term success of your relationship.

The Impact of Emotional Intelligence on a Relationship

An emotionally intelligent man genuinely cares about self-improvement. He has the confidence and adaptability to grow with you and adapts to the changes and challenges that come his way. His resilience helps you both survive and thrive through tough times.

Emotional Intelligence is not just a bonus but an important quality in identifying a man who’s worth being with. So, on your quest for a good man, be sure to check the EI box on your list. Remember, it’s not all about his looks or his charm, but also his ability to understand, respect, and respond to the emotional landscape within and around him.

Signs of Honesty: A Key Indicator of a Good Man

When you’re on the lookout for a good man, honesty should be non-negotiable. It’s not simply about a man who tells the truth, but someone who understands, commits to, and values honesty. An honest man isn’t afraid of vulnerability and is willing to share and communicate with integrity, even when the truth might sting a little. This characteristic will make him not only trustworthy but attractively transparent.

Spotting an honest man can, at times, feel like a difficult task. But there are subtle signs and behaviours that can make the process less daunting. For starters, observe his actions. Does he follow through on his words consistently? Remember, actions speak louder than words. A man who values honesty will demonstrate reliability and dependability, reflecting his words with his actions.

Furthermore, does he show respect for your boundaries. An honest man understands the importance of boundaries and respects them without crossing the line or putting you in uncomfortable situations. He acknowledges your feelings, treats you with respect, and takes responsibility for his own actions.

Then there’s his approach to difficult situations—does he handle them with transparency? The way a man reacts to confrontations or obstacles can reveal a lot about his honesty. He won’t shy away from accepting his mistakes or apologizing when he’s in the wrong. It’s important to note that a man who values honesty won’t lead you on or withhold crucial information.

A good man knows that honesty is the best policy. This guiding principle in his life sets a solid foundation for a healthy and satisfying relationship. He’s someone who’s worth your time and your love—a true testament to the saying, “a good man is a man worth being and searching for.”

Exploring Places to Meet Good Men: Shifting Your Search Locales

One of the most engaging parts of finding a good man might just be the hunt itself. Because each good man is unique, every avenue may lead to interesting opportunities and diverse encounters.

A common misconception is that good men are rare and hard to find. However, there are plenty of good men scattered throughout the world, they may just be where you least expect them! By shifting your search locales, you’re opening up a wide array of possibilities and chances to meet a man worthy of your attention.

Venturing Out of Your Comfort Zone

One step in finding a good man requires you to step out of your comfort zone. Engaging in social events and activities where you wouldn’t typically find yourself is one great way to do this. Whether it’s a fitness class, a new hobby, an online forum, or even a blind date, being open to new experiences is a distinct advantage in this journey.

Rethinking Online Dating Platforms

Online dating platforms can be a goldmine of good men, assuming you’re using them correctly. While they’ve earned a negative reputation to some extent, remember, not every man on these platforms is the same. Plenty of quality individuals are looking for meaningful relationships. A good man can be just a few swipes away!

Varying Your Social Circle

Don’t underestimate the power of your social circle in finding a good man. Variations in your social groups expose you to different types of people, including potential partners. Attend social gatherings, stay connected with extended friends, and always be open to meeting new people. Good men often come via introductions by mutual friends, so don’t hesitate to explore diverse social interactions.

Remember, each good man is unique, and just like a treasured gem, they can sometimes take some time and effort to find. Keep these tips in mind, stay optimistic, and most importantly… don’t forget to have fun along the way!

Mastering Safe Online Interaction with Potential Partners

When it comes to online dating, mastering the art of safe interaction is crucial. In an increasingly digital world, this can be your way of evaluating a man’s character, his sincerity and his intentions. But remember, it’s not just about assessing him, it’s also about ensuring your own safety and well-being.

Firstly, be cautious with the personal information you share. It’s exciting to meet someone who seems to fit the definition of a good man as outlined above. It’s natural to want to open up, to share details and experiences. But temper this openness with caution. It’s okay—and importantly, it’s wise—to take time to build trust.

Active Listening: A Clue to Good Communication Skills

One key to deciphering whether a man is good at communication is to note his ability to listen. A man who practices active listening attentively hears you out, validates your words, and responds thoughtfully. Not only does this confirm that he values what you have to say and respects your viewpoint, it’s also a sign that he is open and present in his interactions. Turning misunderstandings into opportunities for growth is an important part of communication, and it’s something good communicators strive to achieve.

How He Interacts: A Window into His Emotional Balance

How a man interacts online can illuminate key aspects of his persona. Secure men–those who are emotionally balanced, honest and comfortable with their vulnerability–interact in a specific manner. They show care in their responses, exhibiting emotional intelligence and empathy. This thoughtful way of processing and responding to what they see and hear from you is a key indicator of their ability to create and nurture a safe, emotionally fulfilling relationship.

Remember, in any interaction, whether online or offline, your safety and well-being should be paramount. And where a good man is concerned, he’ll understand and respect that.

finding a good man

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A Deep Dive into the Dating Pool: Navigating First Encounters

We’ve all heard it before: first impressions are crucial. But, it’s not just the impression you make on your potential partner, it’s also about how they make an impression on you. In any first encounter or date, observe how he interacts with others and more importantly, with you. Use this opportunity to spot the characteristics of a good man you learned earlier.

There are a few telltale signs of a good man that you can watch out for. One of the most important is his communication skills. A good man is a good listener. He will not just passively listen to what you’re saying but actively engages in conversation. This includes making eye contact, providing validation, responding thoughtfully, and processing what he hears.

Engagement is the key here. Anyone can nod along to what you’re saying, but someone who repeats back what you’ve said or asks questions to gain more clarity is showing genuine interest – a true sign of a good man. This active interaction demonstrates that they value communication in a relationship and it shows emotional maturity, which is paramount in maintaining a healthy relationship.

Remember, it’s also about how the person makes you feel. Do you feel comfortable around him? Do you feel understood, valued, and heard? These feelings are significant indicators of a good man. He will show confidence but not arrogance, a trait that reflects stability and security.

Keep in mind, while one meeting might not be enough to fully understand a person, it can certainly set the tone for what you can expect moving forward. So, pay attention and trust your gut. A good man is not only good to you, he is also good for you.

First Date Red Flags: How to Know He’s Not the One

Understanding the red flags during initial interactions with a new guy is very important. It’s not about expecting him to be flawless but recognizing when behaviors cross your boundaries and go against key qualities you’d expect from a good man.

One immediate red flag is an inability to control anger or emotions. Relationships with men like this will probably lead to roller-coaster rides of emotions and potential abuse. Keep an eye out for how he handles situations – if the slightest inconvenience throws him off balance, it’s a sign of bigger issues.

Also pay attention to how he talks about other people when they’re not around. Ask about his parents or siblings, as well as his friends or ex. Talk that is consistently negative or judgmental, or appears to be dismissive or disrespectful of them shows clear signs of a lack of kindness and empathy – essential qualities of a good man.

Even good men make mistakes and unwise decisions, but what really matters is sincere remorse and responsibility for actions. If he constantly blames others for his misfortunes and never demonstrates accountability for his actions, it’s a red flag.

Another red flag is being completely money-focused. While it’s important to value financial stability, being obsessive about money to the exclusion of all else suggests a more serious issue like materialism or superficiality.

Sometimes, a man shows emotional walls, a sign of being incapable of truly loving you, no matter how seemingly perfect in every other way. If you are constantly being shut out emotionally, and your attempts at closeness are rebuffed time and again, he’s not the one.

Last but not least, respect is a core component of a good relationship. If he crosses your boundaries, makes unwarranted advances, or doesn’t respect your personal space, it’s a major red flag.

Making the First Move: A Woman’s Guide

Making the first move doesn’t have to be daunting. Take the initiative to express your interest in someone. Making the first move is empowering and gives you a sense of control in the dating process.

A good man won’t feel threatened or emasculated if you take the lead. Instead, he’ll appreciate your confidence and directness. Confidence isn’t just a quality that men find attractive, it’s also an essential trait for a strong, independent woman.

When you’re ready to make that first move, don’t let nerves get in your way. Here are a few tips to help:

  1. Be Genuine: Authenticity attracts authenticity. Be yourself. A good man will appreciate you for who you are.
  2. Pay Attention: Notice what interests him and build upon that. Shared interests are a good starting point for meaningful conversations.
  3. Use Humor: Humour breaks down barriers and eases tense situations. If you make him laugh, you’re halfway towards winning him.
  4. Be Direct, But Subtle: Subtlety is key. Don’t come off too strong. Let him know you’re interested but, give space for things to unfold naturally.

One quality of a good man is respect. If he steps back when necessary, it implies he values you and respects your boundaries. If he doesn’t respect a ‘no’, or if he tries to push too hard, he’s not the right one for you.

Being financially independent and the best version of yourself can pull the right men towards you. After all, like attracts like. So, love and respect yourself first, because you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Making the first move is about taking action and seizing the initiative. If you do it with grace, confidence, and authenticity, you’re more likely to attract a good man who values these qualities in a partner.

Learning to Trust Your Instincts in the Dating World

Trust is the bedrock of any lasting relationship. It’s important not only in your relationship with a potential partner but also within yourself. When it comes to finding a good man, your instincts can often serve as your best guide.

Your instincts, or gut feelings, stem from millions of years of human evolution. There is something innate in our ability to interpret our world, including recognizing when someone might be a good match for us, or when they might not be the person we hope they are. This subconscious recognition is a powerful, tangible guide in your search for a good man.

Your instincts are your own personal alarm system. When you sense something is off or doesn’t feel right, that’s your instincts kicking in and trying to protect you. Embrace this, listen to it and trust it; it’s your internal system of checks and balances to ensure you’re moving towards what’s best for you.

How do you do this effectively? Pay more attention to how your potential partner’s words resonate with you and how his actions make you feel. If you find yourself constantly making excuses for him or doubting yourself and your feelings, take a step back and reassess. Trust yourself, your judgment and have confidence in your own perception, even if it may seem illogical at first. Remember, a good man will build his confidence from within and should inspire the same in you.

And of course, a good man will respect your boundaries. So, if your instincts are telling you something isn’t quite right, don’t be afraid to communicate it openly and honestly. Speaking from a place of trust and confidence will nurture your relationship and, ultimately, bring forth a good man who respects and values you.

Although trusting your instincts is not an exact science, it’s an invaluable tool nonetheless. When it comes to navigating the dating world, understanding and trusting yourself can illuminate the path to finding a good man.

Wrapping Up Finding a Good Man

At journey’s end, it becomes evident that the hunt for a good man goes beyond surface-level attributes such as appearance or status. It delves deeper into essential qualities like kindness, honesty, integrity, empathy, and respect. Remember, every good man is unique, bringing his distinctive characteristics and experiences to the table.

Take, for instance, kindness, an often overlooked yet crucial quality. A truly kind man will treat you with dignity and prioritize your happiness, allowing mutual respect and love to flourish in the relationship. Similarly, a man who keeps his word is a solid indicator of his reliability, a cornerstone of trust in any meaningful relationship.

Remember this guide to finding good men as you navigate the tricky terrain of love. Don’t forget to hold out for a man who embodies these cherished qualities, for it’s such men that make the journey worth it. As you continue your path, remember to balance patience with practicality, instinct with intelligence, and self-love with the search for love in others. Keep in mind that the hunt for love isn’t a sprint, but a marathon where the victory lies in finding a match that embodies mutual respect, understanding, and enduring love.

The bottom line is this: A good man is worth searching for. So, don’t settle for less in your quest. Above all, remember that your dating journey is just as much about self-discovery as it is about finding someone else. Happy searching!

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How to Stop Being so Emotional in a Relationship

How to Stop Being so Emotional in a Relationship

Stop Being so Emotional in a Relationship!

Houston, we have an emotional problem! Do you ever wonder how you can stop being so emotional in a relationship?

Imagine if the Apollo 13 astronauts broke down and began yelling and screaming at each other while their chances of returning to earth alive dwindled? They needed every second they had to work out their power issues with ground control.

They did it! They worked through their issues, found a solution, and lived to tell the world about it.

How many times have you unloaded on your boyfriend and later wished you could stop being so emotional in your relationship? I know I have felt bad after cutting off a driver and then following up with my middle finger!

I felt like a loser. I felt even more of a loser when I found out the driver was 75 and I almost gave her a heart attack.

Learning to deal with life’s curve balls logically, without all the emotions is a much better plan. I like to count to ten and take two deep breaths before I do or say anything. It works!  I have also learned that when I have the time, I can write the problem down and examine the source of my toxic emotions.

I am better armed to deal with it in a logical manner if I take this time. The few minutes spent thinking, diffuses my emotions and helps me think more clearly.

I now know the person who is on the receiving end of my rant might never look at me the same again. He or she might never compromise on the issue because I was so over the top.

This means handling situations with emotion instead of logically and realistically becomes a lose/lose situation. People want win/win solutions to their problems and arguments.

Of course, bottling up your emotions can be problematic too, especially if you are a guy. Guys tend to keep things to themselves. Women naturally lead with their emotions so what are they to do? Bottle them up also? What’s the secret answer to help you stop being so emotional in a relationship?

How to Stop Being so Emotional in a Relationship

Dial Back The Neediness

Everyone is emotionally needy to some point but the problem is when your neediness becomes smothering to your partner. Yes, there are times where you will want to lean on him – the loss of a loved one, best friend, or treasured pet, but there are other times when you need to learn to manage your challenges without dragging him in.

If you must unload your suffering on someone, call a friend or family member. It isn’t that your guy doesn’t want to hear about what’s upsetting you. He does care. What he doesn’t want is to be the catch-all for your drama.

Burn Off Your Negative Energy, Stress And Anxiety

It is scientifically proven that exercising will help alleviate stress. It helps release chemicals that counteract the fight or flight hormoones surging into action during those stressful, anxiety-laced moments. When you’re feeling highly emotional, go for a 3 mile run, head to the gym or kick box the crap out of a punching bag. This is a great way to stop being so emotional in a relationship!

Resist The Urge To Text-Bomb Him

Whether he’s the source of your emotional upset or not, he doesn’t want to hear about it in texts. Women have sent me the texts they send their boyfriends before and I’m blown away by how long they are. If a guy has to scroll to read your text, he’s more likely just not going to read it. Again, it isn’t that he doesn’t care – he does. He just doesn’t want to deal with the highly emotional state you’re in at that moment.

Calm down and, when you’re feeling less stressed and anxious, shoot him a fun text – maybe even poke fun at what had you so worked up, if you’re feeling okay about it.

Examine What You’re Really Feeling And Why

Sometimes, we mislabel our emotions. We might think we’re sad when really, we’re mad as a hornet. Sometimes, hurt feelings can come across as anger. Take time to really examine what you’re feeling and where it’s coming from. Is it really that he didn’t screw the cap on the toothpaste or is it that every time you forgot as a kid, you got blasted for it?

Many times, we are blindsided by things from the past. They hit us, but they do so because someone else triggered that old anger, humiliation or hurt accidentally. It can be a real ah-ha moment if you dig deep enough to see where that’s really coming from. That’s when you can really get it off your chest.

What Would You Say To Your Best Friend?

If your best friend were going through what you’re feeling, what would you tell her? We often give our friends and family great advice but when we’re in the throes of a similar situation, all logic and reason flies out the window. Take a step back and treat yourself as well as you treat others. You’re not perfect. Cut yourself some slack – just like you do with your friends!

Build Your Confidence!

It’s when we aren’t confident that we are most reactive. We don’t believe in ourselves, so we don’t believe in our own ability to control anything but you do have control! You can learn to control this and in doing so, you will build your confidence! If you want help doing this, read about your inner game in my confidence book for women, Comfortable In Your Own Shoes.

He Wants To Help!

Your guy does want to help you but guys are fixers of things. We don’t understand your need to just unload without expecting us to do something to fix the problem. You got rear-ended and the insurance company is giving you the runaround? We want to call them and get it straightened out! Your pipe under the kitchen sink burst and sent potato peels and mashed up food shooting all over your cabinets? We want to fix the pipe.

Of course, the problem is that you’re usually just venting. You don’t want us to fix it – not yet anyway. We don’t understand this so now we’re frustrated too. He wants to show you he loves you by solving your problems but he’s not going to listen to those problems if you’re crying your eyes out or slamming cabinet doors.

Once the situation has calmed for you, share it with him and let him help you.

 

The first confidence building book for women and a best-seller, Comfortable in Your Own Shoes will prepare you to meet great men and enjoy a happy and fulfilling life. And not just any life, but a life you design for yourself. YOUR life your way! 

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Lessons Learned about Women from My Dating Years

Lessons Learned about Women from My Dating Years

I thought it might be fun to look back and reminisce about some of the lessons about women I’ve learned through my dating experiences. I asked a few of my male readers too. Feel free to comment below if you agree or don’t or if you just want to toss in some of your own information about women or men!

  • “Don’t try to fix her problems, instead listen and try to understand. She wants empathy.”
  • “Never question how many shoes she has and if she intends to wear them all.”
  • “If she has a cat or dog, you better show her that you care as much about them as you do her or you will be toast. If you think you can fake it you can’t – her pet will know.”
  • “Never have a serious conversation while drunk.”
  • “Speak in full sentences and never answer with “good” or “sure.” Long complete sentences seem to tell her that you care for some reason.”
  • “Help her around the house especially with “unmanly” chores like doing dishes, cooking and cleaning.”
  • “Hug your wife or girlfriend everyday at least once – this will take away any small anger she might be hiding that you don’t know about.”
  • “Do not re-arrange your co-owned condo or house without first consulting her!”
  • “Text her back immediately or else you will pay for it later.”
  • “Make sure she has met all your friends, even the ones you rarely see.”
  • “Understand that Valentine’s Day is only for women and not men, then make it 10 times more special than you wanted too.”
  • “Her birthday lasts 61 days. 30 days leading up to it, her actual day, then 30 days after her actual birthday.”
  • “Your shoes matter too.”
  • “Don’t mess with her plants.”
  • “Orgasms remain a mystery – we wish women came with an owner’s manuals.”
  • “Every woman I have dated seems to like high-end cheese. Maybe that’s just me, but it seems to be a trend.”
  • “Learn all about wine or you will appear uneducated to her even if you graduated from Harvard.”
  • “Most women have no sense of direction and will get lost in a Walmart, even with a GPS.”
  • “She knows all your pass-codes.”
  • “A great sense of humor can counter a small penis (This particular advice comes from my friend not me :)”
  • “Women can multitask like a machine but they know that you can’t so don’t try looking at your phone while she is talking – she will get pissed.”
  • “Don’t ever compare your wife or girlfriend to her mother. If you must compare make it to a hot 20 something diva.”
  • “If you have dated for a year or longer you will never get away with a lie – she will know your body language like a shark smells blood.”
  • “If you don’t know what the 4 C’s mean you are going to learn REAL SOON!”
  • “And finally, don’t wear that shirt! It looks like shit. Let her pick it out.”

So there you have it! 25 or so lessons learned about women that my colleagues and I put together! I bet you have a few chosen ones for men now don’t you??!!

Men and women do almost everything differently, and sometimes for different motivations.

Men view finances, love, dating, dealing with difficult situations, and communication differently than women.

Inside this book, you’ll discover how to improve your relationships by understanding these differences and learning how to overcome them and use them to your advantage.

This isn’t about playing games. It’s about understanding what he’s thinking and how he’ll best understand you.

Take Control of Your Relationship By Understanding Men!

Take Control of Your Relationship By Understanding Men!

Today, I want to help you take control of your relationship. This is part 1 of a 13-part series about understanding men and learning how to get what you want from a relationship by utilizing this information.

In a nice way, of course, and without him ever knowing what hit him! ?

I’ve been studying my gender since birth and my conclusions are not pretty!

Women email me every day, asking me questions about how to gain control over a man, so I’ve been at the bars on Saturday nights and in the trenches getting down and dirty to bring you answers.

Everything that guides a man and makes him act the way he acts is imprinted on him early in life. Other traits are built into his DNA. If a woman can learn and accept these imprints, then she can use them to take control of her relationship.

Take Control of Your Relationship With Knowledge

These are the 12 main ingredients:

Based on these 12 ingredients, I have found the formula for women to get what they desire from men simply by communicating in the language that they understand based on these 12 ingredients.

Take Control Of Your Relationship By Taking Your Power Back From A Man

how to gain control over a man

Only you will know what hit him!

In order to take control of your relationship, you need to gain and maintain the power position. Men can be complacent in a relationship. They get lazy. By taking back your power, you can snap him out of his bad behavior. One way to do this is by using what I call Man Mode. By using Man Mode, you can talk to a man in a way which makes sense to him. This is a concept I teach in my #1 best seller, To Date a Man, You Must Understand a Man which has sold tens of thousands of copies.

Inside my second book written to help women understand men, 10 Secrets You Need to Know About Men: Dating Coach Tells All  I perfected Man Mode. 10 Secrets is filled with examples of everyday situations and then answered and solved by using this formula!

No more philosophical crap from so-called experts that make you feel good for a minute but never work. The formula for getting what you want from any guy looks like this:

Assess the situation + Determine which ingredient fits from above + Adjust your language or action based on my instructions = Get the results that you desire from men!

Sounds simple right? It is and it works like magic!! Gone are the days of begging for the ring, wondering where you stand in the relationship or watching your guy ogle at other women!

Learn How To Gain Control Over A Man With These Tools

Say hello to solving just about any problem with a quality guy using my formula above! He won’t even know what you’re doing – he just knows he loves you and he isn’t going anywhere!

Men and women do almost everything differently, and sometimes for different motivations.

Men view finances, love, dating, dealing with difficult situations, and communication differently than women.

Inside this book, you’ll discover how to improve your relationships by understanding these differences and learning how to overcome them and use them to your advantage.

This isn’t about playing games. It’s about understanding what he’s thinking and how he’ll best understand you.

Getting What You Want From a Man

Getting What You Want From a Man

How to Get What You Want From a Man

Gregg here. I want to give you a couple of tips to help you get what you want from a man by communicating in a way that motivates him.

This is a dating advice tip but also can be used in your everyday life. It works with all people.

Let’s face it, all day long we are dealing with other people and usually we want to get something from another person. If you are married, you might be looking for affection. If you are single, you may be looking for a phone call. If you are employed, you may be looking for a raise. If you have kids, you want them to behave.

How to Get What You Want From a Man | Example #1

So why can’t most of us get what we want? The answer is because we never “ask” from the other person’s point of view. We just come out and state our own needs. A woman might say, “Can you please mow the lawn today, the kids are having a tent party and you have put it off for 2 weeks.”

This is criticizing and almost insulting. I have a better way. Always think in terms of the other person’s point of view. Maybe your husband has been very busy with work or maybe it’s been raining when he wanted to cut the grass.

Try this instead:

“Honey, the lawn needs to be mowed. If I help you write up your work proposal tonight, will that free up some time for you to cut it tomorrow?”

See the difference? You provided something that helps him. Now your hubby is much more likely to get the lawn cut because you thought of his needs too. The bonus? You start working together as a team on his project and he will love you for it.

How to Get What You Want From a Man | Example #2

My next example is about me trying to get what I want from another man but the same principles apply to a woman in the same situation.

Recently, I had my car in the shop twice for the same problem. When I took it in for the third time and I could tell the mechanic was on the defensive.

Instead of yelling at him to fix it right this time, I noticed a picture of his family on his desk so I asked about his kids. “Are these your little ones?” He is all smiles and answers “Yes”. We talk about his little girl playing baseball better than the guys and how proud he his.

When he finished, I casually mentioned my car being fixed and asked if he needed a few extra days to get it done. I acknowledged I might have rushed him last time which may have caused him to overlook something.

He perked up and said he would get right on it, blamed himself, and told me to grab a loaner vehicle. He said he would call me in a few hours. When I got back four hours later, the car was not only fixed, it was washed and waxed for me!

Again, instead of going in guns blazing like I normally would, I decided to take a different tact. I thought of how he felt. Through observation I knew that he had kids and loved his kids so why not talk about them and not my car for ten minutes?

Getting What You Want | Summary

This is powerful stuff! These examples help you get what you want from a man (or woman) by communicating in a way that motivates him. In order to execute this, simply address the other persons needs and not just care about our own.

For more on getting what you want in your dating life and everyday life get my best seller; “Power To Communicate: Get What You Want by Knowing When to Listen and Making Your Words Matter” Click Here!

effective communication

Communication is everything in all of your relationships, personal or professional. Learn the best communication skills right here – how to listen, how to talk to people with different communication styles, and most importantly, how to get what you want from a conversation while giving the other person what they want too. Get your copy today!

A New Year’s Message From Gregg

A New Year’s Message From Gregg

Once again we’ve reached the point when we pause to reflect on the past year, treasure the memories it provided, and look forward with eager anticipation to what the New Year has in store.

As I look back on 2016, I can’t help but think how truly thankful I am for my business, my clients and my staff – and certainly for all of you who read and enjoy my books each day. I’m always thrilled and deeply grateful for your feedback.

Looking ahead to 2017 and all the promise that it brings, here’s hoping for a healthy, happy and prosperous year for us all.

Wishing you your best year yet!

Gregg and the WhoHoldsTheCardsNow Team!

Winning the Game of Teen Life: A Teenager’s Survival Guide

Winning the Game of Teen Life: A Teenager’s Survival Guide

5 DAY TEEN BOOK GIVEAWAY! Winning The Game of Teen Life: A Teenager’s Survival Guide

Hello my readers! Gregg here, and this post is for all the moms out there with teenagers 13–18 years old.

It has come to my attention, as I read all your great emails, that if I could grab youths early in their development, I could circumvent many of the problems that teens will run into later in their lives.

Financials, self-confidence, peer pressure and bullying just don’t get addressed like they should in high school. As an adult life coach, I spend a great deal of time helping people develop skills which help them live happier, and more successful lives. For many adults, their problems began in their teen years when growing up was brutal. Confidence can hit an all-time low as we try to find our way through life. Failed relationships, tragedies like the loss of a friend or family member, divorce, bullying and a host of other events in our young lives slowly scratch away at our outer layer of confidence, leaving us feeling unsure of ourselves, vulnerable and incapable.

Grab Your Son or Daughter and Join Me – Let’s Help Them Kick Butt In High School!

I will be their mentor. I will be their protector. This book contains the pieces of the complicated teen-life puzzle that are missing – the pieces your son or daughter needs! Their friends don’t know these secrets and you can’t always be there because you are too busy – but I can help!

In Winning the Game of (Teen) Life, I am going to crank-up the self-esteem for teens before the damage becomes more difficult to undo. I use this book as a launching point, with two workbooks and a journal included for free. These combined tools provide teens with a new identity, a new confidence, a new sense of what is going on around them, and a new ability to walk confidently in hallways which once were dreaded. Teens who follow this program, beginning to end, will find themselves spending less time worrying and more time enjoying the best years of their lives!

Because I am serious about taking on this venture, I am going to give this book away for free Dec 8th through Dec. 12th! During these dates get Winning the Game of (Teen) Life by CLICKING HERE.

My only favor I ask?  If you like the book, please review the book HERE. Click a star – and tell me what you think. Thank you!

There’s a New Mouse in The House! Online Dating For Women Just Got Better

There’s a New Mouse in The House! Online Dating For Women Just Got Better

There’s a New Mouse in The House!

Online dating for women just got better! Hi Ladies, Gregg here, and I have a big announcement to make. Love is in the Mouse 2017: Find the Love of Your Life With The Click of The Mouse!  is now live! Get your copy for just the price of one cup of coffee HERE

This online dating eBook is all new and concentrates on writing profiles.  In the beginning I give my version of the ultimate profile! Then I teach what to ask a guy and how to move things offline.

Once again, Kirbie and I have created a free workbook to go with the book so you can work along with me, and we have created an eye opening online profile guide called “The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.” Here, you and I look at (and laugh) what not to write on your profile. Both free with the book.

I took some time and signed in as a woman (I do have nice legs haha!) to view a few sites and WHOA, I could not believe what some women are writing! Men too.

My previous Mouse book is still worthy of reading as it lays the groundwork to get you online dating successfully, so keep it as a reference.

I also found a great review website that analyzes and ranks the different online dating sites. My friend Lexi contacted me over at Reviews.com.  New research suggests more than one third of marriages begin with online dating. Finding a potential partner has become much easier, but choosing the best online dating service hasn’t.

Interacting on an ineffective dating site can start to feel like a full-time job that doesn’t ever payout. Because of this, Lexi’s team spent six weeks reviewing 68 online dating sites to find which algorithms actually work and which site was most likely to find you a compatible match. They found your top picks by analyzing web-traffic data, consulting with matchmakers and online dating experts, along with evaluating their user bases, functionality and quality. Even further, they personally tested them to find which ones resulted in the most meaningful interactions and which ones had an excessive amount of obnoxious messages.

Hook-up sites were intentionally left out.

With all of their research, they created a comprehensive guide to help daters find the best dating site for their specific needs (best overall, best for long-term relationships, best app and best niche dating sites). They also offer tips on how to maximize your online dating experience, by making it worthwhile and safer.

The information is free and the tips are very helpful! The link is here. Oh, they also review everything else under the sun too – not just dating sites.

So grab my new book, Love is in The Mouse 2017, for peanuts and then get over to Reviews.com and pick the best site for you!

Copping a new attitude 🙂
Gregg

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