I have been answering your emails, every day, and the subject of “understanding men” from a man’s perspective has become very popular.
On February 24th I blogged about the 12 ingredients that go into men. Can you name all 12? You need to know these so you can understand men once and for all.
Today I want to talk about the 9th ingredient – Why Men Cheat and how to stop this from ever happening!
OK, hate-mail time! Remember, I am not always proud of my gender, but if I am to be honest with you, I must cover subjects like this.
And it’s a BIG one!
We were taught to be successful with women and that includes sleeping with as many women as possible.
Boys are judged by how successful they are with women. Period. The more women we talk to, the more women who like us, and yes, the more women we kiss or sleep with, the more we are respected by our male peers – especially in our early years.
Being successful with women brought us status and confidence in our teens. Guys must be respected by the important people in their lives to complete their “conveyor belt to manhood” and it starts with gaining respect from their peers growing up.
Being good at sports was very important too. I was lucky, I was always picked first for kickball and that brought me respect. But it was the success with women that brought me status.
Did we lie about who we kissed or who we slept with? Heck yeah! I sure did and I know my friends did too. There was always an understanding that we didn’t need solid proof, probably because we were all exaggerating a bit. We rarely “called each other out” for solid proof.
Our desire to remain successful with women continues throughout our lives.
The mid-life crisis example is perfect proof. Here, a middle-aged guy is bored and feeling like his status has faded, so what does he do? He buys a yellow corvette, separates from his wife, and tries to pick up a twenty year old! You see, remaining successful with women goes dormant but it still resides inside men.
Yes, it’s very sad.
Again, I make no excuses for my gender.
For those of you who accept this (and aren’t too pissed off at me), take solace in the fact that there are multiple ways to head this off. You now understand men and you are learning the 12 imprints I teach so you know what to do to counter all these situations I talk about in this series of posts!
Keep him only interested in you with these 4 things:
Yes, you hold all the power with your body but you don’t necessarily know how to wield it! Never give up sex too soon when you are dating. While in a relationship, feed a man filet (and not hamburg) and he will stay home! Be unpredictable. Make sex crazy one day and take it away the next because “you have a headache.” Do it in the elevator. Once in a while make it all about him and he will reciprocate. Roll play. We all have fantasies. Bring them out and stop just reading fiction romance novels.
Keep the challenge and mystery alive!
You know the 12 imprints! You know we love the chase, so keep the chase alive by breaking your routine, sustaining your boundaries, and never rewarding bad behavior. When a man screws up, call him on it and run to your single life. Show him that bad behavior comes with consequences.
On the flip side, show him appreciation when he does well. These actions gain his respect and keep him interested in you and not anyone else. There is no way he can get bored if he is a constant state of keeping up with you and your exciting, and interesting life!
Stay in shape
When you met him I bet you both looked good, or at least better than you do now. So why does it not matter two years later? It does! Stay in shape and make it clear that he needs to also. This keeps both of your libidos firing on all cylinders.
Keep looking hot
We love a girl in sweats but it does get old after a while. Wear a stunning outfit and you will keep our jaws (and our friends jaws) dropped! Do it. If we see our friends drooling, we drool and say, “Whoa, this one’s a keeper!”
I can take ANY scenario, pick from the DNA tree (or the conveyor belt to manhood as I like to call it), and solve your problems that you have with men and now you can too!!
Next week, I will discuss DNA Imprint #10 – Men need to feel that they can provide.
Making your relationship affair-proof involves putting pennies in the jar. By this, I mean building memories and sharing more intimate moments together. This makes your man not want to stray because he has too many events with you that he doesn’t want to let go of. Each time you put a penny in the jar, you’re shoring up your relationship! Get your copy of my book, Pennies in the Jar: How to Keep a Man for Life, by clicking the cover to the right.
Gregg began his journey into understanding the mistakes we make in dating and how to fix them by interviewing thousands of people – happy couples, unhappy couples, singles looking for ‘the one’ and everyone in between. He reviewed his own dating experiences and combined all of this information into his series of dating advice books for men and women.