Money and its Importance to Men
I have been answering your emails, every day, and the subject of “understanding men” from a man’s perspective has become a very popular subject, so let’s continue!
On February 24th I blogged about the 12 ingredients that go into men. Do you remember them?
Today I want to talk about the 5th ingredient – Money and its importance to men. This is DNA imprint #5 on our list.
I bet you have no idea how important money is to men, do you? Many of you are saying that’s crap.
Let me set the record straight.
Let’s Talk about Money
Men are taught to provide food, shelter, and other material things for our family. To accomplish this requires money. We can’t pay the rent, buy a car, and shop for food without it. When a man loses his job, he loses his identity and quickly struggles with anxiety and depression.
Men have larger amygdalas than women (trust me this is not always a good thing.) This is the part of the brain that orientates, warns of danger, sees objects in 3-D, and tracks moving objects. This is the “caveman DNA” in us, also known as the “fight of flight” mechanism.
Money is just the modern day form of protection from our enemies. Instead of a spear, we have money to protect us every day. With money we can defend and hold our own.
It makes sense right? Money keeps our territory and shelter (our land, and house) protected. The more we have the “safer” we feel. Money protects “our women” (trying not to be sexist here) from other alpha males. If I have money and the guy next door does not, I have a better chance of convincing her to stay with me because I can provide better things.
Men Can’t Love if they Can’t Provide
Our caveman days are gone (except when I smell barbecue) and money is our new form of survival!
Many men can’t love without being able to provide. They might try but most fail because they feel like a part of their DNA is missing. What’s missing is his ability to show his family and his peers that he can fend for himself without help.
Women feel that if they have their own money, what’s the problem? They can pay for things.
This emasculates a man. I wish I could share some of my many emails I get from women who have supported their guy only to see him exit without any reason. They think that it is OK to pay for them while they get through school only to get dumped when he gets his dream job.
The reason is so obvious to me. He needs to make his own money to feel good about himself and the person he is with.
The man had not fulfilled his ride on the conveyor belt to manhood, which states he must be able to provide, which means having money! Look back to your list. Remember?
Yes it sounds shallow. Yes, you are saying, “How can a pile of cash compare to a wonderful relationship?”
It compares because we don’t think like you! My book, The 10 Secrets You Need To Know About Men, hammers home this concept.
I would not fight me on this, instead, take it as fact and use it to your advantage. You now hold one more key to getting what you want from a man by knowing the importance of money in his world.
Now you know not to date a man who can’t afford to take you out on a night on the town. Red flags should flash when you find out your 35 year-old date still lives with mom.
Supporting him will be futile.
Are there exceptions? There are always exceptions. If you are married and your husband loses his job, he might temporarily be unable to provide and that’s OK. A quality guy will rebound and make getting a new job his priority.
If you are dating a dude who is broke but is soon to graduate school with an excellent skill-set, then he is motivated and will soon have money – that’s OK too. Just don’t support him through it. Live apart until he can provide.
So now you know how important money is to a man and you can choose more wisely!
Now you know Money and its Importance to Men
I can take ANY scenario, pick from the DNA tree (or the conveyor belt to manhood as I like to call it), and solve the problems you have with men and now you can too!!
Next week, I will discuss DNA Imprint #6 – Status and why it’s so important for men!