How to Text a Guy You Like

How to Text a Guy You Like

Find Happily Ever After, Understand Men

Learning how to text a guy you like is critical in attracting and keeping a great guy. Women and men communicate very differently, and the chances are good that you’re making texting mistakes without even realizing it. You’re also probably sending texts that you think are enticing him, but they’re falling flat. Below are some great tips on how to text a guy you like.

Dry Texting | What is He Really Saying with His One-Word Texts?

Texting Pros and Cons for Women

How to Text a Guy You Like | Build Tension and Attraction

Women often text guys with stuff like, “Hey, how’s it going?” While you think this is a way to engage him in conversation, it isn’t. Instead, he reads it and quickly dismisses it as something that doesn’t require his attention, at least not now. Instead, try building some sexual tension and attraction with your texts.

Lack of Sexual Tension in Your Relationship? Bring it Back

Pay Attention to His Texting Habits

Communication works best when we communicate with someone in the language they best understand. I’m not talking about English versus French. Knowing how to text a guy you like means observing how he texts you.

Few men will text back right away, but if you find yourself one, your job is to reciprocate. You’re more likely to see a guy who replies anywhere from twenty minutes to two hours later.

This is normal male texting behavior. If you’re texting a guy like this, you do the same. Wait a similar amount of time to reply, and maybe just a touch longer.

No, he isn’t sitting there waiting for you to reply. He’s already moved on to something else. Get a handle on what type of texter your guy is, and then text him in kind.

How to Start a Text Conversation with a Guy

Keep Him Wanting More

When you first meet someone new, there’s excitement and chemistry, and knowing how to text a guy helps build them. It’s human nature to sell your best qualities to this person to keep them interested. This comes in the form of oversharing.

While this is very common on online dating sites, it still happens or continues in person.

You get excited and want to share every wonderful thing you’ve ever done to show this guy what a great woman you are.

The problem with this is that he soon knows everything about you, and there’s no mystery. Don’t text a guy your life story. Don’t email it or share it on your first date, either.

Instead, share one great story and let him digest it. Your life is a collection of stories, and he does want to hear them all, but not all at once.

Example:

Him: “Hey, there’s a great Monet exhibit opening this weekend. Want to go?”

You: “Sure, I’d love to. I haven’t seen anything Monet since my trip to Paris last year.”

What Just Happened?

You tossed a hint of something exciting you did. A trip to Paris intrigued him, and he was curious to know more. When did you go? Who did you go with (he’s hoping it wasn’t another guy!)?

If he asks for more information in the text, don’t provide too much. Instead, you can say something like, “Maybe someday I’ll show you some of my lacy souvenirs.”

how to text a guy you like

How to Text a Guy You Like | The Thrill of the Chase is Good, Except…

Men love to chase things like promotions, better cars, and nicer apartments or homes. They also love to chase women, but I’m not insinuating that all men only want to chase women.

There are players, who are only in it for the chase, and there are great men who enjoy chasing you because they’re interested in you.

The best way to get and keep him in chase mode is to avoid being available whenever he asks. At the same time, don’t dismiss his invitations every time, or he’ll think you’re not interested.

Example:

Him: Hey, are you free for dinner tonight? I was thinking the new Fusian place on State

You: Sorry, I can’t tonight. Yoga class starts in twenty. How about Tuesday?

What Just Happened?

Two things happened. First, you still showed interest, but you let him know you’re not his beck-and-call girl. He can’t just text you at the last minute and expect you to be available.

You probably think that’s a bad thing, but it isn’t. He knows now that you’re a busy woman, and he needs to work harder to get on your schedule. If he’s genuinely interested, he’ll do just that. If he dumps you, he wasn’t very interested.

And that’s the second thing that happened. You showed him you’re a busy woman. The risk of you smothering him is lower. It’s all in knowing how to text a guy you like!

Show Your Edgy Side

This lesson in how to text a guy you like could also be called, use your inner bitch. Now, I’m not talking about behaving in a mean or rude way, but in a playful way that shows your confidence and edginess.

Much like women are attracted to bad boys, men are attracted to women who show a little edginess. There’s no fun or challenge in someone who is agreeable and pleasant all the time. Strike a balance between being flirty and edgy.

Example:

Him: Heading out to The Pub tonight with some friends. Feel free to join

You: You’re lying. You don’t have friends 😅

Him: I bought a few last weekend. Hopefully, I got a good deal

What Just Happened?

You’re being playful and challenging him a bit. You’re showing an edgy side without coming across as a total bitch. Of course, you need to know if your guy can handle a comment like this, but you already did that when you observed his texting style.

how to text a guy you like

Keep it Short

Women text in books. Men text very few words and don’t want to read books in a text. Instead, focus on keeping your texts short and, when appropriate, flirty.

When you understand how to text a guy you like, you know that interactions that are a bit challenging are more likely to get a response. General texts like, “How was your day today?” probably won’t even get a reply.

Example:

You: How did your big presentation go today? Get anyone fired?

Him: Nailed it! My boss should be looking for a new job by next week 

What Just Happened?

First, you showed interest in something important to him. It shows you’re paying attention to what he shares and aren’t just absorbed in your life.

Second, you asked a specific question instead of the generic how was your day text. You were short and to the point.

No guy wants to read this:

Hey, I know you had your big presentation today, and I was just wondering how it went? If you don’t want to talk about it right now, it’s okay. I understand…and on and on.

Give Him Something to Work With

Men aren’t great verbal communicators. As young boys, they spend a lot of time grunting at one another. As we age, we grunt and slap each other on the back.

But, you can tease some words out of him with the right challenging texts. Knowing how to text a guy you like is all about learning how to challenge him without coming off as disinterested or aloof.

Example:

You: I enjoyed meeting your family last night. Your dad is a good-looking guy! Is he available?

Him: If you wait twenty-five years, I’ll introduce you to his twin. Meanwhile, you’re stuck with me.

You: Shoot! I hate waiting!

What Just Happened?

He should find this exchange funny. You’re just poking the bear, so to speak. He knows you aren’t interested in his dad, and you delivered a compliment without outright saying it.

I’ve said it before in this lesson on how to text a guy you like, but it’s true. Keeping things playful, mysterious, or challenging will always get you a better response than being boring as milk toast.

how to text a guy you like

How to Text a Guy You Like | Set Boundaries and Command Respect

Boundaries

Boundaries are essential to any relationship, whether with a guy, a best friend, or your family. Yet, many people feel that setting boundaries makes them difficult or unfriendly.

Let’s look at what boundaries are, then maybe you’ll feel better about setting them.

A boundary is a line you place between you and how you will allow someone to treat you.

For example, your guy said he would pick you up at seven for dinner, but it’s seven-thirty, and he hasn’t arrived. The next step is clear if you have a boundary about being on time.

You change into your comfy clothes and put something on Netflix. If he shows up, you explain that you assumed the date was canceled since he was so late. And no, you don’t run down the hall and change.

Yes, he can stay and binge-watch Outlander with you, but the planned date isn’t going to happen.

How do you do this in a text?

Him: Hey, I’ve got an itch to see that new thriller that just came out. When can you be ready?

You: Aw, I’d love to, but that’s really short notice. Can we do it Saturday?

Him: Yeah, sorry, sure we can! We’ll check movie times on Saturday

You don’t need to be inconsiderate when setting boundaries. Just let him know he wiggled across yours and offer a solution.

Men respect boundaries, and they’ll respect you more for having them. It shows you have self-worth, and that’s a big deal.

Is He Moving too Fast? How to Control the Pace of a Relationship

Respect

Respect comes with time, but having boundaries immediately sets up an environment of respect if he’s a great guy worth having. When you learn how to text a guy you like, you’re also learning how to command respect.

Boundaries and respect can be naturally built for you if you develop and maintain a healthy and vibrant life outside your dating. Activities keep you busy and help you write that great story he wants to hear.

Think about revisiting or discovering a new hobby. Get involved in something about which you have a lot of passion, like animals or the Special Olympics. Join groups that share your interests.

All these things challenge you, and he sees that. Your desire for personal growth makes you mysterious and challenging. He respects your desire to better yourself.

How to Text a Guy You Like | Sex, Boundaries, and Respect

Yes, a guy wants to have sex with you on the first date, but this doesn’t mean he expects to. One of the first boundaries you should set for yourself relates to sex.

If you want a man to respect you, do not have sex with him on the first few dates. Only you hold power to say when you will have sex with a man.

I once coached a beautiful Russian woman who couldn’t understand why her great guy wasn’t replying to her texts. I asked her to show me what she was texting him, and she sent me very revealing and sexually charged texts.

They had only known one another for a couple of weeks, and her texts were too racy. He was even begging her to stop, but she wouldn’t. She couldn’t understand why these texts weren’t making him more interested in her. They were doing the opposite.

Sadly, I never got through to her. I suspect he finally just quit replying to her. She was raised to believe her worth was in her sex appeal, and I couldn’t get her to understand that it wasn’t. She was intelligent and articulate but felt her only value in what she could sexually offer a man.

Sex and the New Relationship | When is the Right Time for Sex?

How Many Dates Before Sex?

Let’s Talk About Sex in a Relationship

Avoid Seeking Approval

When you aren’t very confident, instead of wanting to entice a man with your intellect and story, you try to win his approval. This is where many of these inappropriate texts come from – a place of insecurity.

A loser or user won’t see it for that, but a great guy will drop you like a hot potato.

Avoid sending anyone nude photos of yourself. When breakups occur, those end up plastered all over the Internet. Some sites offer men and women a venue to revenge post such images.

If your guy wants to see you without clothing, tell him he must wait until you see him in person and only if you’ve been dating long enough to know he deserves you.

Am I Pushing Him Away with My Insecurities?

Confidence is the Key

Throughout this entire article, the one thing that means more than anything else is your confidence. You’ll be afraid to try the racy and edgy texts without confidence. Without confidence, you won’t set or maintain your boundaries. Without confidence, you won’t command respect.

Confident women are women who:

  • Allow a guy to have sex only after he’s proven his value in her life and not one moment sooner
  • Have and maintain boundaries, with no exceptions
  • Command respect because they respect themselves and are constantly working to improve themselves
  • Aren’t needy
  • Don’t get jealous
  • Stay busy, even after there is a great guy in their lives
  • Aren’t afraid to be a little edgy and playful
  • Have a great story and are still writing

If you don’t feel confident enough right now to pull off the advice above, start with Comfortable in Your Own Shoes, linked below. I’ve also linked my two texting books if you think you can handle it. They will help you immensely in your quest to learn how to text a guy you like.

How to Be More Confident Around Guys You Like

More Articles You May Enjoy

Without knowing it, you’re making big texting mistakes when you text men. Lucky for you, I have the solution! Text Him This, Not That takes care of all these blunders and helps you text a guy in a way that makes him want to text you back sooner!

You’ll learn the importance of less is more, how to invite a guy to hang out without really inviting him and tons more! Read more about this great book here or buy it today by clicking one of the links below!

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dating advice for women books
Conversation Starters for a First Date

Conversation Starters for a First Date

Date Great Men, Find Happily Ever After, Understand Men

Conversation starters for a first date can be a real challenge, but today, Pauline Plott has a few to share. Pauline is a London-based blogger on DatingSpot, and her bio is at the end of the article.

There you are, sitting down for dinner with a person you hardly know. You exchange pleasantries, talk about the pasta, and then it hits you…

SILENCE.

You’re thinking, “This is not good.” 

Suddenly you’re so tongue-tied that you have nothing to do but look down at your food. “Make it end!” you beg internally.

We’ve all experienced it before, but part of being prepared for a date is coming up with a list of conversation ideas that ensures you’re never caught bereft of speech.

Let’s explore some of my favorite conversation ideas for a first date. They are guaranteed to inspire, compel, and even build rapport. But first, let’s go over some discussion basics…

Conversation Starters for a First Date | Listen More Than You Speak

The point of a first date is to get to know the person you’re with. It’s pretty hard to do that if you don’t allow them to do so. Listening more than speaking is a good rule to abide by, but it is essential on a first date.

You’ll enjoy a reasonably even exchange if you both follow this rule. A good indicator of a relationship “clicking” is the ability to volley a conversation back and forth like a ping pong match.

Be Genuinely Interested

No matter how your first date goes, it’s essential to give it your best effort. Part of this can be achieved by showing genuine interest. Even if your date is not the most exciting person in the world, you should still take advantage of this unique opportunity to learn about this person’s unique perspective.

You may find that your concerted effort to act interested makes you curious.

Avoid Taboo Subjects

There are specific topics you should always avoid on a first date. Many of these are apparent, but I have been on innumerable dates where these topics have come up. More often than not, when these issues come up, it is ‘one and done’ for me:

  1. Past relationships
  2. Money and how you spend it
  3. Intimate or sexual details
  4. Marriage plans
  5. Politics

First dates are meant to be lighthearted and fun. Mixing in this kind of discussion makes it neither of those. Of course, that leaves plenty of topics that you CAN broach.

Here are just a few…

conversation starters for a first date

Conversation Starters for a First Date

After reviewing the basics, how about some great conversation starters for a first date? Feel free to expand on these and even come up with some related to things you discussed during the online dating process. Of course, you should prepare your responses to these questions too. Inevitably, your date will say, “And what about you?”

1. Who has been the most significant influence on your life?

This question is pretty typical and seemingly innocuous, but it says a lot about who a person is and what they want to be. If your date talks about a family member, they probably come from a healthy and loving home. If they choose to talk about a famous figure, they have a passion for things outside their world.

2. Where is your favorite location on earth?

This is a good question for learning about where someone has been and can lead to a much deeper discussion about travel. You can also use this response for the planning of dates later on. For example, if your date says their favorite location is Niagara Falls, you can take them on a picnic to a local waterfall.

3. Conversation Starters for a First Date | What is your favorite movie ever?

As far as conversation starters for a first date go, asking about movies and pop culture is a great way to connect with someone. It’s so pervasive that everyone has something to say about movies, TV shows, and celebrities. Once again, the answer to this question can lead you down a conversational path that is rich, interesting, and capable of creating some friendly side discussions.

4. What is your biggest goal?

Similar to question one, the answer to this question can tell you a lot about a person. Goals are an indication of drive, and people who can immediately identify their most important goals are often those who don’t need to go on dates to begin considering the matter.

5. What do you hate most about dating?

Nothing brings people together better than a mutual dislike of something. Dating isn’t always fun, and everyone has something to say about the matter. Talking about your frustrations together is a surprisingly good icebreaker.

6. What should I know about you that I wouldn’t think of asking?

This final question is my favorite and is another of the best conversation starters for a first date! The things someone chooses to voluntarily reveal about themselves that may be quirky can say a lot about them. Like all of the other questions on this list, it can also lead to even more interesting and unexpected questions that result, ideally, in both you and your date having a fantastic night.

These Conversation Starters for a First Date Should Get the Ball Rolling

As you may have noticed, one commonality these all share is that they are not ‘yes or no’ questions and require a little thought. Each can tell you a lot about a person, their expectations, and their dreams.

You may find that you connect with many of the answers and perhaps do not.

I recommend a second date if you think it’s worth continuing to suss things out.

There are 100 more things to discuss with a potential new boyfriend HERE!

About the Author

Pauline Plott is a London-based blogger who became a dating guru after learning the psychology behind modern romance and signing up for every dating website in pursuit of relationship bliss. She shares her reviews and opinions on DatingSpot.

effective communication

Communication is everything in all of your relationships, personal or professional. Learn the best communication skills right here – how to listen, how to talk to people with different communication styles, and most importantly, how to get what you want from a conversation while giving the other person what they want too. Get your copy today!

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Date With Your Head And Not Your Heart!

Date With Your Head And Not Your Heart!

Date Great Men, Find Happily Ever After, Understand Men

What does it mean to date with your head and not your heart? Dating is a tricky business, and it can be challenging to find a great guy. But your chances are hampered if you date with your heart and not your head. It’s Kirbie today, talking to you about dating with your head and not your heart.

Date Confidently, Not Desperately

You know you’re dating with your head and not your heart when you stop feeling desperate to find a man.

Meet Christi. Christi has experienced many changes in her life over the past three years. First, her husband announced he was gay and wanted a divorce. Next, Christi got into the dating scene too soon after her husband’s announcement and found herself a dangerous stalker.

To protect herself and her three children, they moved back in with her soon-to-be ex. During these changes, Christi also broke free from a conservative religious background into something more mainstream.

She was like a rock fired from a slingshot, racing forward with little guidance. Christi is a very beautiful woman who found her photography gift was her way to financial success. Armed with a camera but little confidence, Christi forged on.

She met men online and dated many of them immediately. Finally, at church, she found a man she decided was the one. Did I mention Christi is thirty-four and her fiancé is twenty-four? Yes, they’re engaged after dating for just two months.

Christi is dating from a place of desperation and fear, and I know this from speaking to her. She’s a good friend of one of my daughters, who is now shaking her head in disbelief at the engagement.

Most people in Christi’s life believe she’s making a huge mistake. It’s nothing against the man she’s engaged to but more about the speed at which things are moving. It doesn’t say much about either of them that things are moving so fast.

Then again, we draw people to us who are most like us, so this isn’t a surprise. I fear their union has little hope of long-term success.

Slow Your Roll

What’s the hurry in dating? And don’t tell me your biological clock is ticking. I understand time isn’t on your side if you’re in your thirties. But worse than navigating a high-risk pregnancy after thirty-five is raising children alone because you made a mistake in choosing a mate.

I know. I did it with four kids.

Men and women view dating differently. Men date to have fun first. After they get to know you, they date to chase and for challenge and mystery.

Women date to find a husband.

Slow down and date to have fun. Dating isn’t about a path to marriage, as many women believe. It’s about getting to know someone to see if you fit. Yes, marriage might be the end goal, but you can’t look at a new guy that way on the first date.

Plan fun dates instead of a dinner date. Go bowling or hiking. Take a walk around a quaint downtown nearby. Go rollerblading or find a fun venue with live music. Do different things to learn more about one another.

Not only are these fun dates, but they’re opportunities to build memories together, and that’s key if things get rocky. Sharing wonderful memories is how you build intimacy.

Set aside thoughts of marriage until this guy proves he’s worthy of you.

Is he a keeper? 4 Test Dates to Find Out

What Attracts a Man to a Woman?

date with your head and not your heart

Forget Milestones

When you date with your head and not your heart, you also set aside milestones. You know what I’m talking about.

He held my hand. Milestone.

OMG, he kissed me! Milestone.

He invited me to meet his mother. Milestone.

We’re taking a weekend trip together. Milestone.

Just stop. While these mean something to you, guys are clueless about milestones. He held your hand because he felt like it. Most likely, he kissed you probably out of impulse, not because he wants to marry you.

He invited you to meet his mother because he wanted to spend time with both of you and didn’t know how else to do it.

A weekend trip together doesn’t mean he’s ready to get married, although this might be a sign he’s interested long-term.

Even Gregg got caught off-guard by a woman who was tallying milestones; then, he was disappointed to learn he had to let her down. He was being nice. She was tallying milestones.

Guys don’t understand the markers you have in place to signal deepening interest. As I said before, they date for fun.

Date With Your Head and Not Your Heart | Don’t Have Sex Too Soon

Women with low confidence often have sex too soon in a relationship. We’ve all been there. Right after my divorce, I’m ashamed to say I fell into this trap myself.

When we divorced thirty years ago, I had low confidence. I had low confidence when we married. We were high school sweethearts who began dating between our sophomore and junior years.

Looking back, it’s hard to say it was a mistake because I now have four children and eight beautiful grandchildren. You can’t call that a mistake, but I made many mistakes.

I was raised by a woman whose confidence is still low, so I didn’t have much of a shot of having high confidence myself.

When your confidence, self-esteem, and self-worth are low, you don’t understand your value in a relationship. I didn’t know that having sex too soon in a relationship indicates that you’re dating a schmuck. Any worthwhile guy won’t expect this of you.

I’m not saying men don’t want to have sex with you, but a confident man won’t push you into having sex too soon.

Of course, to be dating a confident man, you must have confidence, which brings us back to having sex too soon.

Men can sniff out confidence. It’s in your body language. Confident men see a low-confidence woman and won’t approach her. Players and losers see a woman with low confidence, and they swoop in for the kill.

If you’re wondering why you keep attracting these types of men, that’s why.

Sex is not how you keep a guy. It’s how you lose one of any value. Set a boundary and ensure a guy is worthy of you before letting him have sex.

Date with your head and not your heart, and you’ll lose the players.

date with your head and not your heart

Date With Your Head Not Your Heart | Write Your Story

Some of your story is written, but there’s more to write. Make it an adventure story! Those are fun to live and experience.

Your story is a collection of your experiences. What occurred in your life to make you who you are today? That’s your story. There are great chapters and yucky chapters in any story. Nobody has a 100% good story.

You choose how to write the remainder of your story. At first, a man is intrigued by you because you’re new and he knows nothing about you. He wants to have fun and explore. He wants to learn about you, slowly.

After a few dates, he needs more. No, I’m not talking about sex. He needs to be challenged. You need to become mysterious again.

Do that by continuing to add chapters to your story. They don’t have to be glorious adventures, just adventures. For example, try a new hairstyle or color. Take up a new hobby or pursue an old one.

Set some goals and go after them. What do you want to achieve in your life? Do you want a promotion? Do you want to own your own business? Would you like to travel? Figure that out and then decide how to make it happen.

Not only does this enrich your life, but it shows the man you’re interested in that you seek personal growth. It tells him you’re not likely to dote on and smother him. It also tells him you value yourself.

But writing your adventure story does one other thing. It helps you build more confidence. Each time you challenge yourself, you build more confidence and become mysterious to him. He wonders what you’ll do next. Now, you’ve started to date with your head and not your heart.

Understand Men

Much of what you find on this website ultimately boils down to two topics. First is understanding men, and right behind it is helping you build more confidence.

Without a doubt, these are the two most important topics to any woman who is either in a relationship or seeking one.

Do you want to find a great guy? Build or rebuild your confidence.

Would you like to learn how to keep your great guy? Build or rebuild your confidence.

Do you want your ex back? Rebuild your confidence.

Understanding men is always an undercurrent because men and women are so different. We communicate differently. We love differently. Men and women view important things differently.

Until I started working for Gregg, nearly ten years ago, I didn’t get any of this. My confidence needed some work, and I was clueless about men.

Today, my confidence is much higher, and I have a greater understanding of how the male mind works.

As you consider your next dating move, I encourage you to click the links in this article and read the books I’ve added at the bottom. I don’t get anything for encouraging you to do either, other than knowing I’ve pointed you in a good direction.

Gregg is genuinely passionate about helping women. I hear it in his voice every time we speak, and it’s evident in his videos. He wants to help you enjoy an excellent relationship with a great guy! That’s my hope for you as well!

Go forth and have fun! Date with your head and not your heart!

Do you have your Night Moves down? Are you ready to go out and get a guy to fall for you, using science and not trickery? If so, this is the book for you! I’ve done the research, and you get to benefit. Here are the steps you can take, whether you’re headed out on a first date or going out with your friends to look for men. The science behind attraction is just a few clicks away!

Here are just a couple of things you’ll learn inside this best-seller:

  • Red lipstick is magical when it comes to attraction…learn why inside
  • Looking at a guy, looking away, and then looking back with the right timing sends a clear signal…but what signal? Learn inside the book
  • You can get a guy to feel like he’s falling for you with a few subtle movements. Learn what they are in this book!

Read more about this book or click one of the buttons below to buy it now.

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Are You Dating A Loser?

Are You Dating A Loser?

Understand Men

Are You Dating a Loser?

Are you dating a loser, like one of my readers, Evelyn?

Evelyn wrote to me six months ago ut a sad but all-too-common situation. She has allowed me to share her story with you.

Gregg,

In the last six months, I’ve been dumped by no less than three guys. They all told me how happy they were initially and then either totally disappeared or slowly faded away.

What am I doing wrong?

It’s gotten to the point where I don’t want to date anymore for fear of getting hurt again.

HELP!

Evelyn

Evelyn has a great career and keeps her life vibrant with friends and hobbies. She’s a busy, positive, and happy woman. On the surface, there isn’t a good reason for her to be in this position.

So, it was necessary to dig deeper into what was happening. I assumed she was making the usual mistakes, like not creating enough challenges or making him her hobby, but she wasn’t.

Evelyn has read several of my books and articles and knows how to handle a man. So what happened?

What Was Evelyn’s Problem?

It was time to look at Evelyn’s situation through a new lens. With her help, I examined all three guys, plus a few other men she’d dated, in search of the common denominator.

Of course, all these men were somewhat similar. We tend to keep choosing the same type of person without realizing it, so it makes sense that the result is the same.

In this case, Evelyn was going after the loudest and funniest guy in the room, a personality type opposite of her father. It’s OK to pick that type of guy as a target, but more screening is needed.

This is where Evelyn was failing herself. She went all-in immediately without first making sure these guys were worthy of her. They weren’t.

dating a loser

How to Know if You’re Dating a Loser

Evelyn grew up with negative male role models. Her father was demanding and unfeeling, and she was drawn to men who appeared to be otherwise by their fun-loving outward appearance.

The men she chose fulfilled a need in her, but they weren’t any better for her than the men of her youth. These men were toxic and did her a favor by exiting her life.

What Evelyn was missing was a BS detector for men. She needed a way to decipher which guys were losers, which ones were users, and when she’d found a great guy.

Signs of a Player

A player, or user, is a guy who spots a low-confidence woman at fifty paces and goes in for the kill. He sees something in her that he can benefit from and is ready to go after it.

If a guy approaches you, saying all the right things and listening to you, there is a great chance he’s a player. If you’re unsure, the player will text you immediately, maybe even before you make it home. He wants another date as soon as possible, so he can get what he wants from you: sex or money.

He’ll ask seemingly innocuous questions like when your next day off is or how you’re getting home. This tells him how soon he can get another date and get into your pants. If he wants your money, he’ll inquire about your job.  

The shy guy is the one you want to pay attention to. He hasn’t practiced his lines on one hundred women before you. He wants to talk to you, and now, he is tripping over his tongue in nervousness.

Root for this guy. He is the one who’s more likely to be the great guy, and he’ll probably feel more comfortable around you once you accept him.

There are more signs that you’re dating a loser, which you can find in the book below.

Signs of a Loser

A loser is different from a player. While a player knows he doesn’t want anything long-term, a loser thinks he does.

Neither is capable of long-term love, so neither is a good fit if you’re looking for something that lasts into eternity.

This guy truly believes he wants to be in a great relationship, but when he gets close, he goes rogue.

A loser probably has some relationship trauma in his past. Either his parents had a bad relationship, or he experienced one that ruined him. There are women out there you should want to pound into the ground for ruining otherwise great men!

This guy is fearful that past failures will come back again, making him non-committal when it’s time to get serious.

A loser might get married, but he’ll never be 100% in. This type of guy can be lazy and selfish, not excited about doing things with your family and friends. He always has an excuse.

You’ll find more on dating a loser in the book below!

Signs You’re Not Dating a Loser – You Have Mr. Right!

Mr. Right is the ultimate goal, so you and Evelyn both need to know what that type of guy looks like too!

A confident man, aka Mr. Right, accepts responsibility for his life. Instead of blaming shortcomings on someone or something else, he owns it, learns from it, and moves forward. He also has goals and a plan for the future.

This guy is enthusiastic about dating you, not just in the beginning but months into your relationship.

Mr. Right will do what he promises and show up on time. He is respectful of you and those close to you and would never dream of embarrassing you or arguing with you in front of others.

dating a loser

How to Stop Dating a Loser

If you have a loser on the hook right now, it’s time to get rid of him! Don’t allow your fear of being alone to get in the way. You’ll find a great guy soon, but first, you need this guy to go away!

If you’re single and not in a relationship, great! I’ve linked a second book below, Riding Solo, and it’s the perfect time to read it!

Take this time to build your confidence. We draw people to us who are most like us. Even if you have a great job, hobbies, and friends, your dating confidence may be low. Guys, sense this. Great guys stay away, and the losers and users move in closer.

Your best defense against dating a loser is to rebuild your dating confidence. To do so, be sure to get both books below! Neither costs much, but both will help you tremendously!

Don’t you think you’ve dated enough losers? Isn’t it time to find a great guy to date? Maybe you think you already have!

This book will help you know for sure! You’ll go in-depth on the good and bad qualities to look for in a man so you an know for sure.

End the guessing game and Weed out the Users!

BUY NOW US
BUY NOW UK
BUY AUDIBLE
Take Control of Your Relationship By Understanding Men! Final Post: How to Keep a Guy From Getting Bored

Take Control of Your Relationship By Understanding Men! Final Post: How to Keep a Guy From Getting Bored

Understand Men

The last topic in this series on understanding men is how to keep a guy from getting bored. For links to each of the previous articles, scroll to the end of the article.

I embarked on this journey to present the twelve ingredients that go into men because most women don’t know how men tick. Why would you? You’re female. We are also clueless about what makes you tick.

Today’s topic, how to keep a guy from getting bored, is no less important than the previous eleven. One could argue it’s essential. A man who’s bored in a relationship can develop a wandering eye. Not all men, but some.

How do you prevent this from happening? Read on, my beautiful friend. Read on.

It Boils Down to Two Things: Mystery and Challenge

Don’t roll your eyes. Did I just see you roll your eyes? Yes, if you’ve read my books or other articles on this site, mystery and challenge aren’t new topics to you. I understand that, but hopefully, by seeing them repeatedly, their importance will sink in.

If you’re new to the site and my writing, let me give you an overview of each.

How to Keep a Guy from Getting Bored with Challenge

Before I write one more word,