Are You Dating a Loser? Or Have You in the Past?
6 months ago, Evelyn came to me with a sad, but common, situation.
She allowed me to share her story with you.
Hi Gregg, thank you for taking my email. In the last 6 months I have been dumped by no less than 3 guys all telling me how happy they were at the beginning and then either totally disappearing or slowly fading out. What am I doing wrong? It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even want to date anymore for fear of getting hurt again. HELP – Evelyn
Evelyn is not a “rest stop”, she is a high value woman (keeper) with a good career and lots of friends and hobbies. She is busy, positive, and a happy woman. There is no reason why she should get burned my men.
I examined how she was acting once she started liking a guy. I figured she was making all the mistakes, like never creating challenge or making him her hobby.
In fact, she had been following me and she knows how to handle a man.
So what gives?
I decided to look at Evelyn’s situation on a deeper level. We looked at all 3 guys and an array of other men she had dated in her past. I was looking for a common denominator.
As is common with most of us, she keeps choosing the same type of man over and over without even knowing it! Evelyn chooses the guys who are the loudest and funniest in the room. This type of man is totally opposite her serious and demanding father. That’s OK, but she needed to screen these men more.
She was choosing wet kittens and not Lions.
Evelyn’s therapist knew why. Growing up was a lonely time and all the male figures in her life were horrible. She was being drawn to men who fulfilled a need, even though they were bad too. They just were not as bad as the horrible men who raised her.
The men were actually doing her a favor by dumping her – as odd as that may sound, because they were toxic. Unfortunately, this constant stream of failed relationships tanked her confidence.
Evelyn was missing one key ingredient. I was failing to give her the one thing she really needed – the tools to keep men from playing games with her!
She was looking for strong men but she didn’t know how to distinguish between a good strong man and a user who comes off as being strong. These men were strong, but they were players and cons or guys who could not love. Some of the men knew it and others didn’t. Evelyn was listening to their spiel but not testing them. Why should she? These men were showing all the signs at the beginning. Understand this – these men are pros, many are careerists at duping women so they can have their needs met before moving on.
This stops today!
Evelyn’s one mistake was allowing her heart to get involved too soon.
You must screen men through a series of tests so you can study their actions. Words mean nothing. It is through actions that men show their true feelings and if they don’t match up, you get the heck out of dodge!
This is why I am wrote Weed Out The Users, The Couch Potatoes, and The Losers: Expose and Dump The Toxic Men in Your Life!
This books shows you exactly how to do this! I define the 4 types of men and then we test the crap out of them before your heart gets involved. If they pass, then you are good to go, if they fail, you dump their fluffy asses.
Evelyn, cried with tears of happiness when I let her know she was never the problem – it was simply the guys she was choosing. Evelyn found her man!
I gave her the new game plan and now you will have it too!
The book is called Weed Out The Users, The Couch Potatoes, and The Losers. You guys have helped me write it and I am grateful to you.
This book will be published on Amazon on September 7th, 2017.
Let’s expose and dump those wet kittens, so you can clear the deck and find your LION!
Gregg began his journey into understanding the mistakes we make in dating and how to fix them by interviewing thousands of people – happy couples, unhappy couples, singles looking for ‘the one’ and everyone in between. He reviewed his own dating experiences and combined all of this information into his series of dating advice books for men and women.