You’ve spotted an attractive man across the room and your interest is piqued, but do you know how to tell if a guy is single without asking? I mean who walks up to someone and says, “Are you single?” It’s just not done.
So, what can you do to answer the question, “Is he single?” There are a few things you can look for to help you figure it out and none of them involve asking a stranger that question.
What You’ll Find Here
It’s All About His Body Language
He’ll Ask for Your Number but not Provide His
He’s Available at Strange Times
He’s Edgy When You’re Together
You Got His Number But…
Weekend Getaways are Non-Existent
You Always Hang Out at Your Place
He Never Goes on a Spontaneous Date
Your Dates are in an Adjacent Town
He Won’t Discuss His Private Life
He Pays with Cash Often
He Says He’s a Commitment-Phobe
He Completely Falls off the Radar
Wrap Up
How to Tell if a Guy is Single without Asking | It’s All About Body Language
The first clues lie in his body language. If you haven’t met him yet, watch his body language while he’s around his group of friends.
Most people square their shoulders to the most important person in the room, to them. If he’s facing another woman and it’s not just conversational, but consistent, she’s most likely the light of his life.
Any subtle contact he makes with her will also clue you in. Along with that, he’ll make eye contact with a woman he’s interested in, and he’ll close the distance between them.
Other signals might include preening for her or running his hands through his hair. He’ll try to make her laugh if he’s still trying to win her over. His body language overall will be open with his hands wide or at least at his sides.
He’ll Ask for Your Number but Not Provide His
He might play this off as saying it’s his work phone or something like that, but if he’s single and interested, he’ll give you his number and if he doesn’t, it’s because he doesn’t want his wife or girlfriend to see your messages.
Also, don’t let him give you a safety excuse. Even men who saw Fatal Attraction years ago will give their number to a woman they like. Men don’t carry the same worries women do about giving their number to a stranger. They’re often bigger and feel they can protect themselves.
He’s Available at Strange Times
He has weekend plans with his wife or girlfriend, so you get what’s left over. He might ask for daytime dates or weeknight dates instead.
Of course, this is one of my signs that he’s a good guy, but not this time. It’s fine to test a guy by asking him to see you during the day, but if he suggests it, be careful.
Most guys aren’t into daytime dates because there’s a lower chance of sex, so if he does suggest a daytime date, be prepared to meet him somewhere where you won’t be seen, like a hotel or an off-the-beaten-path restaurant.
Weeknight dates only raise a red flag if all your dates are during the week. A weeknight date is fine if you’re enjoying dates on the weekends too. Then, you can be sure he’s not dating someone else or married.
How to Tell if a Guy is Single without Asking | He’s Edgy When You’re Together
If his phone rings or buzzes with a text, he might jump out of his skin out of nervousness. He’s so afraid of getting caught that he’s wound up pretty tight.
You might even notice that he can’t seem to relax at first. As time passes and he realizes he isn’t getting caught, he might relax. He may not be impacted by this if you’re not the first one he’s cheated with too, so this isn’t always present.
If he does answer a call or text, he will leave your presence to do so. He’ll leave the room or excuse himself for a few moments. Of course, everyone has the need for a private conversation from time to time, but not every time.
You Got His Number But…
Well, he gave you his phone number, but you only get replies from him during the daytime and never after seven in the evening.
This is because he doesn’t want to text you while he’s with his wife or girlfriend. During the daytime, he’s chatty as he can be, then come evening, crickets.
If he works nights, you can shift this around to when he’s home. He might text you a lot during the evening hours, at least until it’s too late, then once he’s home, nothing. Either way, he’s got something to hide.
How to Tell if a Guy is Single without Asking | Weekend Getaways are Non-Existent
You’ve been dating for a while and you’d like to take a weekend trip together, but no matter what you suggest or when he can’t make it.
Just like you won’t get a weekend date with him, you won’t get a weekend trip. The only way he can pull this off is if he claims he’s on a business trip, but how many of those happen on the weekend?
Not only will he not be able to make it for a weekend trip, but he also never stays through the night. He always dashes out before it’s time to go to sleep.
You Always Hang Out at Your Place
He never invites you to his place because another woman is there. Everything you do is at your place or somewhere secluded.
He’ll make excuses like, “Oh, my place is a mess” or “I have a roommate.” Yeah, he has a roommate, but it’s not a guy.
Beware of a guy who won’t take you to his place. He has something to hide.
Are You Dealing with a Cheater?
Do you think your guy is cheating? If he is, does it mean your relationship is over? This article is a great one to help you sort that out, but there are others! Just click the button below to find them.
He Never Goes on a Spontaneous Date
He’s not very likely to say yes to a spontaneous date invitation. He needs to check in at home first to see if he has other plans.
If you suggest a date in the next few days, you’ll get a standard, “We’ll see.” This is also code for I need to make sure I don’t have plans with my girlfriend/wife before I commit to plans with you.
If he suggests a spontaneous date, it means he just realized his wife or girlfriend has other plans and he’s free.
How to Tell if a Guy is Single without Asking | Your Dates are in an Adjacent Town
Instead of going somewhere in your town, he suggests going to this cute little place in the next town over. He makes it sound all romantic and quaint, but the real appeal for him is that it’s not where he can be spotted.
He’ll say something like not wanting any distractions, and I guess that’s true since the distraction he’s avoiding is another woman seeing you both together.
He Won’t Discuss His Private Life
He’ll share anything you want to hear about his work and friends, but he stonewalls you when you ask about past girlfriends or his home life. He probably won’t share where he lives in much detail.
If he’s into you and single, he wants to share everything about himself. His home is part of his status – who he is – and if he wants to impress you, he’ll brag about it and where it is.
He Pays with Cash Often
When a guy doesn’t want his wife or girlfriend to see his dinner date bills, he’ll use cash. This way, his activities can’t be as easily tracked. Occasionally is okay, but if he pays for everything you do together with cash, something’s fishy.
In today’s credit card climate, there may even be instant alerts to an iPad or phone when he’s used a card, and if he shares that card with someone else, she’ll know.
How to Tell if a Guy is Single without Asking | He Says He’s a Commitment-Phobe
As time passes, if you haven’t figured out yet that he’s otherwise attached, it’ll be time for a commitment. Unfortunately, what you don’t know is that he already has a commitment to someone else.
Instead, he’ll say he has a commitment phobia and he’ll avoid all further discussions about moving in together or making a formal commitment to one another.
There’s the possibility that he’ll say okay to something like that but never follow through also. Guys will say anything to keep you interested. I’ve known men who will even buy an engagement ring with no intention of getting married.
I make no apologies for my gender.
He Completely Falls off the Radar
This is the worst possible scenario for you. One day, your guy just never reaches out again. At first, you worry that something is wrong, but after a few days, you realize he’s ghosting you.
A few more days and you’re somewhere between ticked off and worried sick.
He may turn up after a couple of weeks, saying he was busy at work, lost his phone, or some other lame excuse.
Don’t believe him. He was on vacation with his wife or girlfriend, and couldn’t text you, let alone call. He may have even temporarily blocked you so nothing would show up.
How to Tell if a Guy is Single without Asking
If you see some of the signs above, consider whether your guy is really single. All roads point to him having someone else in his life, aside from you. You deserve a man who can put his full attention on you, but you also deserve a man who is honest and has integrity.
A man who pretends to be single when he has a wife or girlfriend has little integrity and lacks honesty. This isn’t the type of man you want in your life. If he will lie about something that big, he will lie about other things.