Is Your Smartphone Hurting Your Relationship?

According to a recent Baylor University study, phubbing – or phone snubbing – was found to harm relationships, leaving people less happy and less satisfied overall. Phubbing occurs when someone focuses their attention on their phone instead of the people they are with. Hello! It’s me, Tiffany with the latest trending topic on social media and a question for you – is your smartphone hurting your relationship?

The Negative Effect of Phubbing

The study showed that people who are overly attached to their phones tend to have more conflict in their lives, which leads to more fighting and hurt feelings (usually about the phone issue at hand), and can further the damage a relationship.

In today’s fast-paced, technology driven world, people communicate face-to-face less and less often. How can you interact on an intimate level with your face buried in your smartphone? Real connections are either lost or never made to begin with when this happens.

Yes, social media is a great tool to meet new people and keep in touch when you are apart, but when you are with someone in person, there is a detachment that does more harm than good when your focus is on your phone and not your significant other.

Warning Signs You (or Your Partner) Might be Phubbing

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Is there a phone always within view when you are together
  • Do you keep yours on the nightstand at bedtime
  • Is it always on the coffee table when you are snuggling on the couch
  • Do you need it on the table during dinner?
  • Does the phone seem to be glued to your hand or your partner’s hand?
  • Does your partner answer a call or text in the middle of a conversation with you?
  • Are you distracted, checking your phone or scrolling through Reddit/Facebook/Twitter instead of being present and engaged?
  • Is your partner never content to just enjoy quiet time together without checking for messages?
  • Do you whip out your phone whenever there is a lull in conversation?
  • Does he need his phone to fall asleep?

If any of these behaviors sound familiar, a smartphone may be hurting your relationship.

Alone with Your Selfies

More bad news — that selfie habit can also be damaging your relationship. Posting photos of yourself on social media can alienate the people in your life and make them see you in a negative light. Probably the opposite effect you were hoping for when you snapped that pic of your sexy pout, on your phone camera, and splashed it all over the Internet.

Most people find selfies annoying and narcissistic, especially if you’re always interrupting a good time to take a picture, posting more than once a day, or constantly checking for ‘likes’ and comments. If anything, your man will think you’re insecure. And according to Gregg Michaelsen, Boston’s top dating coach and best-selling author of dating books for women, insecurity is a big turn off. There’s nothing more attractive than confidence.

How to Break the Habit

Smartphone addiction is a real issue, but it’s unrealistic to think you or your partner can quit your phones cold turkey. Smartphones serve a real purpose in regards to safety and convenience, but what can you do when your phone usage goes from practical to obsessive?

Being aware of the problem is the first step. The next thing to do is to set boundaries. Have a face-to-face discussion with your partner about your feelings, and agree upon when it’s okay and when it’s not okay to be on the phone when you’re together. Keep phones off the dinner table and definitely out of the bedroom. And visit to break the habit for good — I promise it’s worth the visit for a chuckle and a little insight at the least!

I will admit it. I learned about the dangers of phubbing while scrolling though my favorite news feed. And you’re probably reading this on your phone right now. We all could benefit from a little less screen time, I’m sure! But, if your man loves his cel phone more than he loves you, it’s probably time to hang up.

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