Starting a Text Conversation with a Guy

Starting a Text Conversation with a Guy

You just met a new guy, and you need some text conversation starters that won’t send him running.

“How are you?” just ain’t gonna fly.

A great text conversation with a guy begins when you first meet him. What is he in in to? Sixty-seven Mustangs? His German Shepard dog named Moe?

Maybe he is studying for a test he must take next week. These are the homerun texts that will get you responses. If you can’t remember squat, then secretly browse his social media pages.

You want to hit him with personal, pithy texts that only he could answer. Do this and he will want to answer even if he hasn’t been sold on your awesomeness yet. Remember, you probably just met so these texts need to keep him hooked.

Keep your texts short and fun. Ask some questions. Questions yield responses.

“Jim! This is Megan from Saturday night. You in the garage working on that blue ’67?”

“Hey, I’m walking my dog Larry – I think Moe and Larry would love to meet!”  

“Johnny! How the heck are you? How did your realtors test go on Monday?”

Notice I used his name. People love hearing their name so use it.


how to start a texting conversation with a guy


Confident Texts

These texts exude confidence. They show a man that you like him, but you only will like him as much as he likes you.

“Gregg! Hitting the gym after work, you up for joining me? I’ll teach you the right way to do crunches!”

This text has it all. It’s a question. It states his name. And it issues a challenge. Men love challenges and this one is a good one. This text also tells Gregg that you are going to the gym with or without him.

Notice what is not in this text. There are no ‘maybes’, or ‘if you have the time’ types of low confident words.

Starting a Text Conversation With a Guy: Timing Texts

Timing and spacing of your texts is critical too. Texting a guy you just met last night will sound a bit desperate if you text him later that night or first thing in the morning. Wait a day or two, but not three days.

Text him only as much as he texts you – actually, text him less. This keeps him chasing. Your goal is to get him off the phone and on a date, chit-chatting all day long on the phone.

Once he responds, delay an hour or so. This is a nice balance. Gone are the days of getting back days later. People won’t wait that long.

Obviously, there are exceptions. If he has tickets to a sports event that night, you need to respond quickly.

Never Double Text

If he doesn’t respond, then you are done. He needs to make the next move, or he is not interested. Repeating your text twenty minutes later will not get him to respond. You could try one more time two weeks later, but that is the last resort.


Why Is He Texting Me If He’s Not Interested

More Great Conversation Starting Texts

“You and I killed it at Sunday karaoke! Where did you get that voice?”

Compliment your guy on his singing passion while you include yourself. He combines his passion with you and BINGO…he is drawn to you.

“What do think of this sixty-three split window ‘vette?”

OK, you cheated on this text. You knew he is a car lover, so you did a little bit of studying and you sent a pic. Later, you can admit to this, and he will be just as impressed, but for now let the text ride!

“Jimbo! I was thinking about getting a dog, what breed would you recommend that won’t chew on my neighbors leg?”

Funny. Short. You gave him a fun nickname which only close friends normally do, and you asked a question. Very nice.

“Lare Bare! (His name is Larry) Come join my friends and me at Ricco’s tonight! They have a great band, and I would love to see your smiling face again.”

“Today is the first day of the rest of your life! That’s all I have so let’s get crazy and get a pepperoni pizza at five. You in?”

This text is just silly and dumb. Guys like silly and dumb. It tells him that you are a unique character, which you are! Grab another phrase and start your text with something that strikes you.

“I woke up, looked in the mirror and I looked fantastic! I can’t wait for tomorrow 😊 You around for dinner on Tuesday? My treat.”

Again, this is just silly. But it’s very confident and he will pickup on this. You’re calling yourself pretty – which you are and then you pivoted and asked him out in a cool, casual way. If it’s me, I’m scratching my head wondering who the heck is this woman and craving to get to dinner.

“Peter, this is Beth just checking in to see if you can repeat your incredible performance last night. If I don’t hear from you, I will take that as a no and I will look elsewhere for a boyfriend 😊”

This one is cocky but it’s great. He gets a compliment; you tease him about becoming your boyfriend, but you mellow it out with an emoji.

Conversation Starting Texts Summary

These text conversation starters are so powerful! I can go on forever with examples, but you get my point.

  • Think outside the box
  • Make your opener something that no one else would say
  • Risk it!

If this guy can’t laugh and jump in with his own funny response, lose his ass and move on! These texts become a test to see if he is worthy of you. If he can’t engage, you’ve saved yourself time and energy.

If you have read my stuff, I know you have multiple options of guys to date. Don’t let your text game be your weak link.

Get my international best seller today – Text Him This Not That.

Without knowing it, you're making big texting mistakes when you text men. Lucky for you, I have the solution! Text Him This, Not That takes care of all these blunders and helps you text a guy in a way that makes him want to text you back sooner!

You'll learn the importance of less is more, how to invite a guy to hang out without really inviting him and tons more! Read more about this great book here or buy it today by clicking one of the links below!

dating advice for women books

Dry Texting-What is He Really Saying with His One-Word Texts?

Dry Texting-What is He Really Saying with His One-Word Texts?

What the heck is dry texting? It’s when you put together the perfect text, check it twice, and hit send. Two days later you get – “lol.”

I know how much that irritates you because I’m the one who gets the emails asking what the heck is going on!

The sad (for you) truth is that guys do not like to text paragraphs, but if you are getting one word answers while waiting two days, it’s time to dump him for good.

I’m serious. There is no excuse for dry texting. It means one thing – he doesn’t care about you.

But you’ll probably make excuses for him, won’t you? He was at work. We had a great first date…blah, blah. Let’s see if you’re right.

Dry Texting Exceptions

You were Texting Back and Forth, and He Just Quit Replying

This happens. In my best seller Text Him This Not That, you learn how men text their male friends – in short bursts that are to-the-point. Never paragraphs.

Guys get sick of reading paragraphs of texts. They just won’t do it. If I were to text my buddy John a 100 word novel, he would dry text back, “WTF!?”

Texting is just the new way of talking and men are not great communicators for the most part. They communicate best in person, with actions and body language!

So, if he is engaging in long texting conversations, and suddenly dry texts, his male DNA (I just realized I hate communicating with women) might have kicked in! Consider yourself lucky and back off your texting.

Your Guy is Old

Let’s face it, some old guys never got the memo that texting is cool! Yes, they’re out there. I have 65+ readers that are dating men that refuse to have smart phones. There are older guys that have smart phones but have no idea how to use them let alone text properly.

Therefore, women might be getting one word answers because that’s all these guys can muster without throwing the phone into the swimming pool!

He’s Busy

If I’m driving or I’m at work, I rarely reply to texts unless I see they’re really important (someone is ill, injured, etc.) But, I will still text back later, if I care. People do have lives and texting can be an annoyance during the day. In fact, I have a no texting policy for the guys who work for my construction company.

Dry Texting as a Test

For confident women, dry texting is a godsend! It shows you immediately through his actions if he likes you. Use it to your advantage.

Once he gives you a few one-word texts, stop texting completely. You could even give him some shit back before you dump him by texting, “YTSFO” and see what he says, if anything.

When he dry texts back, “?”, you say “Your texting sucks, f**k off!”

It may just put a smile on your face!

But Don’t Shy Guys Dry Text?

In my experience working with shy guys, no. In fact, many shy guys are good texters. Texting becomes a good conduit for them to get around their shyness.

In fact, shy guys are the type that will read an endless text. So if can not help yourself and you are determined to text novels, you might consider putting a shy guy at the top of your dating list.

Dry Texting Summary

I can’t think of a better test at the beginning of a relationship to judge how much a man likes you than dry texting. If you send him, “I have some great news to tell you,” and he responds the next day with a question mark, he doesn’t care to be in a relationship with you.

The reason doesn’t matter because he doesn’t even know you. Therefore, it is not about you, it’s about him so why waste your time?

The key is to date several men, even more than one at a time, so you have choices and options. If you are dating one guy, you may tend to go all in too quickly and allow him to get away with this crap. But if you are able to date multiple men (not sleep with but date), you don’t care as much if one of them dry texts you.

Without knowing it, you're making big texting mistakes when you text men. Lucky for you, I have the solution! Text Him This, Not That takes care of all these blunders and helps you text a guy in a way that makes him want to text you back sooner!

You'll learn the importance of less is more, how to invite a guy to hang out without really inviting him and tons more! Read more about this great book here or buy it today by clicking one of the links below!

dating advice for women books
How to Build Attraction with Text Towards a Guy You Like

How to Build Attraction with Text Towards a Guy You Like

How to Build Attraction with Text that Keeps Him Hooked

There are rules when texting guys. Learn a guys texting behavior and mindset, and you get the upper hand! Even later in the relationship, you can still learn how to build attraction with text if you follow along with me below.

Destroy Boredom, Shatter All Things Conventional!

You: So, what’s going on with you these days?

Him: Not a lot. Just working, going to school.

I’m going to stop here. I could make that a long text conversation, but I felt repulsed by where it was going. You do know where it’s going right? To the relationship graveyard! It’s going nowhere. There’s nothing in that first comment that did anything to build mystery, challenge or attraction into the relationship

There are two huge mistakes in this short conversation. First, mystery and challenge are simply not created by asking general questions. How was your day? What are you doing right now? What’s the weather like? These types of statements are not attraction makers, they’re attraction killers.

Guess what I’m thinking? Meet us at Ocean Prime Saturday or else!

These are much better. You could even text him a great compliment but then back off. The way you handled yourself with that disabled woman was amazing. This brings out his hero instinct and draws him to you.

Learn a Guys Texting Behavior!

Your goal, when texting a man, is to keep things fun and fresh by using some of the techniques we’re discussing. You can’t do anything fun or fresh with “What are you doing right now?” If a man even bothers to answer this, it’s a cursory response and he rolled his eyes as he was typing. In other words, he responded to be nice, not because he’s actually interested in the conversation.

The second problem with this exchange is that nobody wants to answer a question like that in a text. Even if you have the most easy-to-use handheld on the planet, you’re going to get sick of typing out a response the size of Moby Dick pretty quickly. Keep it simple and stick with precise questions that he can answer without too much trouble.

rules when texting guys

How to Build Attraction with Text – Challenge Him

You want short, fun and challenging interactions. You want to be bold, quirky, funny and direct! Forget the boring stuff and show him your flirty side. There are rules when texting guys. You have time to create a great response. Delaying keeps him chasing.

You: How was traffic into Boston this morning? Still woozy from the CO2 fumes?

Him: Haha! Yep. Sucked in fumes for 2 hours.

There we go! This text is focused and you added in a bit of cheekiness as well. Then, you don’t text him back for period. This shows him how super confident you are!

Stick with the Mysterious, Avoid the Vague!

When it comes to building attraction with text in relationships, staying mysterious is always good. The more you can make him wonder what you’re doing, the better. Mystery is invoked by staying partly aloof. You want him to think you’re busy doing lots of fun things, or maybe seeing other interesting people!

Him: What are we doing this weekend darling?

You: Dance class on Friday night. Wine tasting with Jennifer Sat. Crazy busy! Maybe Sunday, I’ll let you know.

Do you see what happened? This text creates mystery by avoiding some boring comment like “Not sure, what are you doing?” You’re obviously busy, and by the sound of it you’re meeting people who are not him at your dance class. Trust me, he’s going to see you as a serious challenge, adding to the attraction.

guys texting behavior

There are Rules When Texting Guys that Most Women Don’t Know

Responses like these, however, are completely unacceptable:

“Waiting to hear from you.”

“I’m up for anything, what do you want to do?”

“Kind of tired, long week. What’s up?”

Texting responses like these kill your momentum. They make a guy want to go silent instead of engaging. Guys texting behavior is simple to grasp!

Inspire A Man To Chase You With Your Texting!

Men are wired to chase women but one quick way women kill this inclination is with their texting. Men and women communicate very differently. This probably isn’t a newsflash for you. Women text like they talk – in long, descriptive bursts. Men text like they talk – few words, little to no emotion and in their own time, not yours.

Text Him This, Not That clears of a lot of the mystery behind texting men! It will help you not only inspire him to keep chasing you, but it will often get him to respond faster!

Similarly, keep ugly vague words out of your texts. Maybe, kind of, perhaps, sort of – they’re all too vague! Stick to texting language that’s alive and bold, and you’ll become a master in no time. Remember these rules when texting guys and you’ll keep him fixated on you and not other women.

Try these texting strategies to build attraction with text to a guy you like and get results!

Texting Pros and Cons for Women

Texting Pros and Cons for Women

Today, I’d like to share texting pros and cons for women. Every day, readers email me about getting back into the dating scene, and texting a man intimidates them. And it should because texting has become our primary way of communicating. The problem is that men and women share differently; most women make mistakes without realizing it.

Below are a few of the texting pros and cons for women.

Pros of Texting in a Relationship

When you text, you aren’t required to be fast on your feet with responses; your wittiness can shine because you have time to respond. In contrast, you are left face-to-face with a dry conversation if you can’t find anything witty to say.

Texts don’t show nervousness, so sweaty palms, shaky hands, and a quivering voice go unnoticed when you text.

When you practice ‘texting similarity’ with a guy, he perceives you as being in sync, and your relationship is harmonious. Additionally, you can be flirtatious between dates, keeping things a little hot.

A quick “I love you” or “Just thinking about you” text during the day can remind someone you care about them. Additionally, texting can be a quick response if you can’t talk to someone at that moment.

When distance separates you, texting can be an inexpensive and quick way to stay in touch.

And finally, women use texting to apologize, work out, or bring up issues. It’s often easier than apologizing or bringing up something negative face-to-face.

Cons of Texting in Relationships

You might find yourself in relationship texting maintenance mode; when you send more texts, he expects more. This heavy texting is associated with feeling dissatisfied with their relationship.

Often, you can’t decipher the mood of a text, so misunderstandings occur quickly and lead to arguments.

It’s also easy to overanalyze the texts you send and receive. This happens when you put weight on using capital letters, using exclamation points, capital letters, etc.

Your texting behavior can label you; you’re too needy, quick, or slow to respond, you can’t spell, your language skills are lacking, and so on.

Texting is not a good way to deepen a relationship. That requires face-to-face time where you can build intimacy.

Too much texting can make you look needy or clingy – stalkerish even.

You can edit texts and therefore modify them from the original thought. In contrast, a phone call is out there, and you can’t take your words back, so texts can be ‘false’ messages, not genuine from the heart.

You don’t get to know the ‘real’ person but the version of themselves that they want to send via text. For example, someone can be funnier and seem more relaxed than they are in person.

Using Texting When You Shouldn’t

While there are texting pros and cons for women, there are also times when texting is just the wrong way to communicate.

Texting can replace face-to-face contact if it is more comfortable, resulting in a lack of time spent together. Sometimes, couples find chemistry in texting that does not exist in person. 

On the other hand, you don’t have the advantage of using body language to accentuate your message. You can convey many messages through body language, which is a significant loss.

Today’s overuse of technology makes people unable to express emotions. They spend all their time in emotionless texts and emails instead of one-on-one communications. In face-to-face communication, you can see the outcome of what you say or do to someone.

Texting feels safe. You can remain at a level of casualness in a relationship where it neither declines nor advances. You’re alleviated from the challenge of taking things further and free of the anxiety of relationship failure.

On the other hand, relationships that rely heavily on texting can be easier to end. There is a lack of intimacy you only gain by spending time together in person.

Men use texting to distance themselves in a relationship or disengage from deeper intimacy. You’ll see them use texting to avoid hurting your feelings or growing closer if they’re afraid.

Beware that texting is a written form of communication that can be recalled later, including in legal battles. You may think you’re deleting texts, but experts can always dig them back up.

Texting Pros and Cons for Women

At the core of every fantastic relationship and great text is a conversation built out of challenging the other person. In your case, the guy you like. Your relationship will thrive if you use texting wisely and sprinkle in the right amount of face-to-face time.

Power Texting Men is a great book to help you get your texting mojo on! It provides you with tips on keeping things steamy between dates and getting him to respond to you sooner. You’ll also learn how to eliminate your texting blunders and learn the importance of timing, structure, and intent. Additionally, you’ll learn why less is more and what you can say that he’s never heard from any other woman. This book is a must-read for all women!

Pin It on Pinterest