Good morning ladies, it’s Kirbie today, and I just finished reading all of the fantastic comments from Gregg’s post, 8 Questions All Men Would Like Women to Answer, and I think we have a few questions of our own, so I speak for us all when I ask these – but please feel free to ask questions only guys can answer in the comments and we will let Gregg provide us with his “Guy” answers!

Help us understand men better!

Why do we have to conform to you all of the time?

As I was reading the responses to the above blog, what occurred to me was this one question….why do WE have to conform to YOUR personality all of the time? Why can’t you guys bend in our direction?

Yes, I realize we need to understand how the male mind works, but it seems as if the end result is “this is how men are, deal with it.” Where’s the give and take?

Questions only Guys can Answer | Why all of the adventure?

I don’t know how many online profiles I have read where the guy wants a woman who is interested in his boating, hiking, biking, workout and golf habits? Many available women past a certain age are most likely divorced and raising children.

We don’t have your free time…don’t expect us to be interested in spending every waking moment before we met you adventure seeking. Adventure for us is throwing a dark-colored pair of socks in with lights to see if the whole load gets trashed or leaving the 3-year old alone while we go to the bathroom.

Why do you think we want to hear every bodily function you have?

Seriously. Okay everyone has gas and everyone uses the bathroom, but this is not an open invitation to share those moments with us. Close the bathroom door. At least mute the phone if you absolutely must use the bathroom while we’re talking or text us instead! And for heaven’s sake, if you had chili with onions for dinner, start the meal with a Beano.

The 60-minute poop (sorry I know, it’s a gross topic)

Here’s a question only guys can answer. When women need to use the bathroom, we go in, we sit down and we go. We don’t, as my mother calls it, “nest”. We don’t take reading materials. We do what we need to do and we move on.

Why is this not the case for men? If you want to read Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition, do it somewhere else. Some day, you’re gonna get hemorrhoids from this (true fact) and we’re not rubbing any cream on it for you!

Shoes, socks and belts

Black shoes go with a black belt – and while we’re at it – black socks – not white socks. By the same token, what’s up with this new trend to wear black socks with tennis shoes? Um no.

We don’t expect men to be all matchy matchy like women are, but there are a few no-brainers which make you look like you know what you’re doing – and I know some woman in your life has already told you these! I speak for all women everywhere when I say this – “She is right”.

Have you ever ‘swallowed’ – (no not like that) – I mean have you ever tasted semen yourself?

This could possibly eliminate all of the begging men do on this topic. Seriously – it’s not a salted caramel latte you’re asking us to throw back – not even in the neighborhood. While we’re on the topic of sex, if you would leave your penis alone when we’re not around, it might not take so many antics to get you off in the first place.

Boobs – what’s the attraction?

Women’s breasts are functional – placed there to nurture offspring with highly nourishing milk. Nowhere is it written that breasts are for your entertainment.

If men got less giddy about breasts, maybe women wouldn’t get harassed so often when they attempt to do what is natural – feed their child. Due to this male obsession, women damage their bodies with needless and sometimes dangerous implants – all in the name of looking attractive to a man. Personally, after 4 children, I’ve got nothing of interest to offer in this area.